Page 475 of Forbidden Billionaires: Vol. 8
There was a long pause as the cop processed everything he was seeing. And then he shook his head. “Sir, please accept my sincerest apology. I thought you were some douchey frat guy dressed like an idiot. But now I can see that you’re just being authentically you. And I’m so proud of you for that. Don’t ever let anyone tell you how you should dress just because of the equipment you were born with. And if any frat guys ever give you any trouble, don’t hesitate to give me a call.” He pulled out a business card and tucked it into Chad’s thong.
He started to drive off, but then he swung back around.
“Sorry,” he said. “Almost forgot to give you this.” He handed him the second cucumber back. “Word to the wise: don’t forget the lube. That cucumber is no joke.” He gave him a wink and sped off.
We all somehow kept straight faces until the cop turned the corner.
“Dude!” whispered scooter. “You’re a fucking legend!”
He really was. I thought for sure I was gonna have to show that cop my tits to get him to go away. But Chad had handled it like atotal boss. And I was getting serious vibes that the cop wouldn’t have liked my tits anyway.
“Hell yeah!” Chad adjusted his grip on both cucumbers and put one leg up on the trashcan in front of the sorority. I posed next to him, pretending to suck on the giant dildo, and the rest of the guys got in the picture too.
Slavanka lifted the camera. “Say gulag!” She snapped a photo.
“Alright,” I said. “Onto location number 2!”
“Wait,” said Chad. “Shouldn’t we kill two birds with one stone and get a picture of a topless girl while we’re at the sorority?” He looked up at the building.
“I mean…we can kinda do that anywhere. But if you insist.” I tossed the dildo aside and pulled the top of my dress down.
Scooter gasped and pretended not to stare.
Watermelon moved his watermelon lower to cover his junk.
And Shakespeare said, “Those are such stuff as dreams are made on, and our little life is rounded with a sleep.”
“Was that about my tits?” I asked.
“Huh? Tits?” said Chad. He’d been staring up at the sorority this whole time for some reason. “Whoa!” he yelled when he finally looked back at me. He dropped the cucumbers and grabbed my tits.
“Babe!” I yelled. “You can’t go groping me in front of all your friends! That’s completely inappropriate.”
“I wasn’t groping you. I was covering you!”
I laughed. “Mhm. Sure you were.” I pulled his hands off of me and posed for the camera.
A group of guys passing by whistled at me and I gave them a little wave.
“Don’t make me beat your asses!” yelled Chad. But his lacy red thong made the threat significantly less intimidating. Either way, his jealousy was really turning me on. I loved when he got all territorial.
“Say borscht!” Slavanka snapped the picture and I pulled my dress back up.
“Nowcan we go to location #2?” I asked.
“Yeah.”
We piled back into the limo. Tracking Ash down required a slight detour, but it didn’t take long to find her trying to blend into a brick wall that was roughly the color of her hair.
Then we were on to the museum.
“Let me off at the front and then circle around to the back door,” I said to Ghostie. “Then wait for my signal.”
“Nope.” Ash shook her head. “No way. I know the start of a heist when I see one. We’ve already narrowly avoided prison once tonight. I don’t want to push my luck.”
“I’m not stealing anything. I promise.” I hopped out of the limo and ran up to the front door of the museum. It had been closed since 5 pm. But there was still a security guard on duty.
I tapped on the glass to get his attention.
