Page 495 of Forbidden Billionaires: Vol. 8
The lights in the control room turned red and the guy in the center spun around. “That’s your cue,” he said.
“Our cue?” I asked.
“We no bring gifts,” said Slavanka.
The guy pointed at us. “You’rethe gifts.”
“Oh, I love that! Just to be clear, who are we supposed to be having sex with?”
“The dude in the white robe.”
Well that’s disappointing.I thought tonight was gonna be my night to have some fun with all five of the punch masters. I could have sex with Chad anytime. Although I guess fucking him in front of an audience would spice things up a bit.
I turned to Ash and Slavanka. “Come on, girls! Let’s go give Chad the most epic initiation ever.”
Ash’s eyes got huge. “I’m not gonna lose my virginity to Chad!”
“Why not?” I said. “I’m going to.”
“You’re not a virgin.”
“Sure I am. I haven’t had sex all day. And I’ve never had sex on a sex altar. I’m a classic double virgin here.”
“Uh…I’m pretty sure I heard you banging Teddybear in the shower this morning.”
“Was that this morning? Huh. I guess it was.”
“And anyway, virginity means you’veneverhad sex.”
I laughed. “Right. That’s what it means in like…middle school. But that’s an impossible standard in college, so it makes more sense to do it by the day.” And then something hit me. “Wait. Whoa whoa whoa. Are you telling me you’re a legit virgin? As in, you’ve never had sex?”
“Of course,” said Ash. “I’ve never even had a boyfriend.”
“Holy shit. Girl…we need to fix this immediately. Come on.” I tugged on her arm to try to take her out to the sex altar.
She pulled away and hid behind a chair. “I’m not going out there!”
“Why not?”
“Because! There are like a million people watching! And they’re definitely filming it. And do you seriously want your boyfriend to take my virginity?!”
Everyone in the control room was staring at her.
“Sure,” I said with a shrug. “He actually has a perfect starter dick. He’s on the smaller side so it probably won’t even hurt.”
“No!” she screamed. “No, no, no!”
“Are you sure? Losing your virginity on a sex altar would be totally epic.”
“I really hate to interrupt this,” said the guy in charge, “because this is the most entertaining conversation I’ve ever witnessed. But I really need at least one of you to go out there immediately or I’m gonna be in deep shit.”
“Okay, okay. I’m going.” I started towards the door. “Oh! Before I go out there, any suggestions on which positions look best in this lightning?”
“You’ll look amazing no matter what,” he said.
I smiled at him. “Yeah I will. You coming, Slavanka?”
“No, no. Bitch boy not my type.”
