Page 55 of The Arrangement
Sebastian hummed and nodded. “Yeah, he’s right. What if Liam doesn’t deny it? What if he embraces it?”
“That’s a good thing!”
“And what if, as part of embracing it, he wants to experiment?” Sebastian continued.
“Still a good thing. I’m happy to be his guinea pig.” I shrugged and shoved the sausage into my mouth. The flavor was maybe a little better with images of all the naughty things I wanted to do to Liam. All the things to make him moan and cry out my name.
“Mind out of the gutter for a moment, please,” Byron said drolly. “What I mean is that Liam might do those things with you and have no romantic feelings toward you. It’s only casual sex. And yet, you’ve said that you have feelings for him. Can you detach yourself enough that you won’t get hurt?”
The sausage instantly became a rock in my stomach. I put my fork aside and slouched in my chair, frowning at my nearly empty plate. Even Carol’s wonderful cooking couldn’t save me.
“I can answer that question—no,” Sebastian interjected. “Rome is like me. He wears his heart on his sleeve. We can do casual sex?—”
“Not fucking anymore,” Byron growled under his breath.
Sebastian chuckled and leaned over, brushing a kiss across Byron’s cheek. “Not anymore,” he reassured in a whisper, only to continue a second later with what he was saying. “But once our emotions are engaged, there’s no turning them off. You can have fun experimenting with Liam and introducing him to so many things, but eventually, he’s going to find someone he has romantic feelings for and leave you behind. What’s worse, you’re both going to feel betrayed and destroy the friendship you just got back.”
“Be up-front with him, Rome. Tell him that your emotions are engaged.Romantically. Tell him you’re happy to experiment with him, but that all those kisses and touches mean something more to you. If he’s a genuine friend, he will respect and appreciate your honesty. I’m sure he doesn’t want to hurt you.”
Byron’s fierce but gentle words rang in my ears. There was nothing he said that I didn’t know deep in my heart. I had to come clean with Liam. Sure, I didn’t know the depth of my feelings, but I wanted to explore them. I wanted to try dating him and see if there could be more between us. Yet, I didn’t want to put more pressure on him right now.
Of course, this was all assuming the man didn’t sneak out of town and hide away in the hills like some hermit, digging in the dirt for fossils and scaring the local kids with stories of dinosaurs.
Fuck, why did everything have to be so complicated?
19
LIAM ROSE
“Didyou have to pick the coldest night?” I asked as we hurried from the ticket counter to the entrance gate of the zoo.
“It’s not even close to the coldest night. It’s still above freezing, you baby,” Rome teased.
He was right. It wasn’t that bad, and I had layered prior to leaving the house, so it would take a while for the cold to sink in.
Honestly, I’d been a little surprised when Rome had suggested this outing and persistently pointed out that this wasnota date. Only two friends hanging out.
Of course, since the morning following the sleepover, we hadn’t talked much. I’d gotten busy with work at the museum and the university. Not to mention, my remaining waking moments were spent in near-constant contemplation over what we’d shared physically. It had helped that I’d had Friendsgiving with Emily and her girlfriend. They’d had no problem turning our holiday into a wine-and-bull session. They’d shared their personal experiences and had answered my questions as best as they could.
Guilt twisted in my stomach that I hadn’t shared that conversation with Rome, but talking with Rome came with an added complication.Feelings. I was starting to suspect that whatI felt for Rome was more than friendship. And just maybe, he was the same. Both of us had vested interests in what happened next, so maybe he wasn’t the most unbiased person to talk with.
Leaning in close to him as we entered the zoo, I said in a low voice, “You know, I was expecting you to suggest we meet up somewhere more private.”
Rome’s head whipped around, his wide eyes catching the twinkling white lights that filled the trees. Even in a knit hat and a scarf, he looked too handsome for words.
Yeah, I was more comfortable admitting that now. I no longer needed all the caveats and asterisks to reassure myself of my masculinity and heterosexuality. Rome Ashbridge was a handsome man. He was fucking sexy. Especially when he smiled.
“Really?”
I grunted. “I didn’t think you’d had enough on Saturday. That you’d want to be intimate again.”
Rome gasped and choked on a rough laugh. “Yeah, well…maybe, sure, but we haven’t gotten the chance to talk much since the weekend. As much as I’d love to have some fun, it’s more important to me that you’re comfortable. No pressure, you know?”
If I fell in love with Rome, would it shock anyone? Seriously? I couldn’t remember knowing anyone as thoughtful as Rome. He might be prone to craziness and being recklessly impulsive, but he also tried to make sure that no one got hurt.
“How have you been?” Rome asked.
“I’ve been…whoa!This is insane!” We’d started walking among the other zoo patrons, and my eyes lifted to the spectacular display of holiday lights that stretched over everything. It was a blanket of warm, white stars that had come to Earth so that we could nearly touch them. I’d heard all the advertisements for the past few weeks for the Festival of Lightscelebration, but I didn’t feel like it had adequately prepared me. Besides the usual lights on the trees and the enormous Christmas tree, I could see colorful displays made to look like the zoo’s inhabitants farther down the lane.
