Page 114 of Beauty Beneath the Sorrow
His hand glides along my stomach, lifting my tank top with it. I let him pull it over my head, exposing my bare chest to him. He moves from one nipple to the other, coating them in his saliva. They’re wet and pointed. While lying on his side next to me, one hand runs along my stomach and waist while he leaves kisses on my sternum and down to my belly button.
Without glancing up for approval, he props himself up on one arm while using the other to lower my underwear. My body trembles as he traces a line with his lips from one of my hips to the other. Carter has learned my body, and I’ve come to trust him fully.
My hand is on the back of his head, bracing myself for what’s to come. His mouth continues along the inside of my thigh, then he kisses on top of my throbbing pussy, but he doesn’t slide his tongue in yet. When he gets to my inner thigh on my other leg, he moves his body between my legs.
I open for him. The cool air hits my clit, making it swell even more. Carter loops both of his arms around the back of my knees and pulls me on top of him. Locking my legs with him directly underneath me, he looks up at me with a flare in his darkened eyes that I can even see with the small amount of light in this room.
“Sit on my face,” he commands, gripping me tighter. Leaning over him, I clench my muscles to keep myself upright with nothing to hold on to.
“I have nothing to keep myself up with.”
“Ride my fucking face,” he clarifies, then darts his tongue between my slit. The shockwave sent through my body loosens my posture, and I fall forward, landing on top of his mouth.
“Mmm.”
I hear his muffled moans.
My palms flat on the wall, I roll my hips over his mouth. Carter’s tongue slides in and out, sucking and licking. My body tingles and my head falls back. Getting lost in the moment, I relax on top of him. Carter turns his head to the side to get deeper. I feel him nip at my insides, opening and closing his lips with pleasure.
I slide back and forth over him, and when I get too far away, his tongue chases me. I lower to give him more. My stomach starts to clench, and my insides throb. I’m buzzing and ready to come. Carter turns his head a little, opens his mouth, and devours me entirely. My legs lock, and my chest flashes with heat.
“Oh god, I’m coming,” I squeak, rocking my hips. My legs relax a little while a powerful orgasm rushes through me. Riding my aftershocks, Carter grips my hips, holding me in place. Histongue swirls the walls of my insides until it becomes too much, and I fall forward.
“I’m not done,” he scolds, still seeing my body twitch. He flips around as I’m on all fours and positions himself at my back. He runs his wet tongue over my puckered hole that’s now in the air.
I yelp as my orgasm, which was winding down, reaches another peak. He licks one more time before tucking his head under me and taking one last suck on my clit.
“Fuck, Carter!” I fall to my stomach. Adrenaline is pumping through my veins. My eyes water.
In no time, he’s flipping me over once again. He fucks me hard and passionately.
When we both have nothing left, Carter wraps a strong arm around me and scoops me up into his lap. He slides a hand through my hair, tilting my head to one side. There’s anguish behind his eyes. I can tell by how he’s searching mine.
“Are you alright?”
He lowers his head. “Something is happening between us.”
My breath hitches because I know he’s right. I wasn’t expecting to have this conversation. I guess in my own delusional world, I thought we could go on living how we have been, and then everything would magically work itself out. But that’s not the case. Life doesn’t work like that.
There is something happening. It’s utterly terrifying. I know better than to think we can keep going the way we are. My feelings are intensifying by the second. Carter reaches my soul—parts that no one has ever seen and parts I never knew existed. I can’t quit what we’re doing, but I can’t acknowledge iteither.
I force a smile. “We’re being us, like you said.”
His lips meet the tiny flicker of pulse on my throat. “I breathe for you.”
I bite my bottom lip, trying to breathe while my chest feels constricting. I can’t give our feelings life. If I do, then this will be over. I’d rather go along with how we have been.
“You’ve had a hard day and an even tougher week.” I track the outlines of his bicep tattoos. The word “jag” is another one of my favorites—his call sign, something that he’s been identified by for most of his life. “Let’s get some sleep and talk about it in the morning.”
“You can’t push this aside.” He lies back on his elbows while I stay securely on his lap.
“I’m not pushing anything aside,” I try to defend myself, but I know he’s right. “I don’t want to talk about it tonight.”
“Will you ever?”
The tips of my ears burn with frustration. I’m not ready yet. I’m fucking scared of what all of this means. The higher I rise in love, the harder I’m going to fall when it all comes crashing down.
“I’m not ready yet!” I shout, holding back tears.
