Page 117 of Beauty Beneath the Sorrow
My forehead furrows. I’m not messing around. Lina is everything. But the last time I brought this up to her, she became upset and shut down. She’s afraid to admit it to herself, so admitting it to me is completely out of the question.
I need her in my life in whatever capacity she’s willing to give, but my patience won’t last forever. Now that people are finding out about us, there’s an extra layer that we have to explain.
It’s one thing to find out that we’re sleeping together, but it’s another to accept that your best friend and daughter areonlysleeping together. If Lina and I were forthcoming about our love, maybe there would be a path forward with him because it wouldn’t be viewed as me using her—even though that’s the furthest thing from the truth.
The last week has been fucking draining. I don’t have any more energy to go back and forth with her. I am sure of my feelings. I’ve tried to speak with Lina about them. I feel defeated and frustrated.
“You’re right. That’s all we’re doing,” I reluctantly agree, pulling my pants on.
Lina slides her hands around my waist. “He’ll be fine. I’ll assure my dad that it’s his choice, and it’s something simple and nonserious, so he won’t get worried about you breaking my heart.”
My muscles feel stiff under her welcoming embrace, but I can’t relax. “That’s a good idea.”
“Then we can just go from there,” she says.
I tuck my hands in my pockets, stifling the urge to hold her. “Okay, Lina.”
Lina raises to her tippy toes to kiss me, but I don’t kiss her back. Her lips meet my closed mouth. She senses that I’m upset but doesn’t mention it. “I’m going to head home. I’ll call my dad on the way.”
I nod, refusing to look at her as she walks out of my bedroom. Only a second later, I heard the door shut.
I clamp my eyes shut. Sitting in silence, I start to filter through everything that has happened in the last few months, but I’m interrupted by my phone buzzing on the nightstand. I ignore it. It buzzes again. I lean back to swipe it off the charger and quicklyglance at who it is. This time, I check to see who’s calling.
It’s a Florida number.
I answer immediately and recognize the woman’s voice on the other end of the phone. She’s from the flight academy. My shoulders sink, not prepared for whatever she’s calling for. I need to make a decision about whether to take this position. I don’t want to continue to live in limbo.
“As I was saying,” the woman on the phone continues as I try to bring my focus back to her. “I know we tried to schedule a meeting last month but did not hear back from you.”
I sigh. I’ve been so caught up with Lina that I completely forgot to schedule that trip. “My apologies.”
“We understand, but the team wanted to reach out to you one last time since the instructor who was set to retire next fall has now gone into early retirement due to medical reasons.”
“Okay.” I listen intently for what she’s going to say next.
“I’m calling to formally extend an offer for you to meet with the team.” She pauses. “But they’re insistent on meeting with you this week.”
I tuck my phone between my chin and my shoulder. Wiping a hand down my face, I take in each one of her words. “Okay.”
“So, pending a formal meeting—which I’m confident will go well—the job is yours if you can start by the end of the month.”
The end of the month.
“Okay, thank you. I can be there by the end of the week.”
“Wonderful. We’ll email you the location information. See you soon, Captain Hernandez.”
I quickly say goodbye before swiping up to read a text that just came throughfrom Lina.
Lina: Spoke with my dad. He said he’s going to need some time.
Me: Alright. I’m sure I’ll have to speak with him at some point.
Lina: I’m sorry he had to find out this way.
Me: Me too.
And with that, my worry about Brian is not my main concern—it’s my future with Lina. I want her to be a part of it, and I’m tired of waiting.
