Page 119 of The Other Brother

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Mel’s next to her in a bright blue dress that might be a tad too short for church, but what do I know?

Mel meets my eye and gives me a how-are-you-doing? eyebrow raise. Awesome, it appears I’m now going to receive pity from my sisters rather than scorn.

Potential comments I could make to annoy her flash through my head. I could try to reset things back to normal. In the end, I don’t attempt anything more than a halfhearted shrug in response. I’m over faking it with my sisters.

“Where’s Chris?” Mum asks after she’s cooed over Ethan for an extended period.

“He’s collecting his parents from the hotel because they were worried about driving here.” Kate delivers the words in rapid fire. “But the minister wants to talk through the ceremony with everyone who is participating. But Dad and Cody aren’t here yet… oh, here they come now.”

We all crank our heads to get a view of Frank, Heather, and Cody coming down the aisle.

Heather is walking slowly, leaning heavily on a walking stick. But I barely notice her because I’m too busy looking past her to Cody.

It’s ridiculous how even though I’ve been bracing myself for this moment, my gut still grinds and my heart pounds like it’s trying to escape from my body. I don’t blame it. I’d escape from this situation too if I could.

Cody’s dressed in a white shirt paired with tan pants with a light blue tie. It’s funny, I’ve seen him in jeans and T-shirts, in his school uniform, in a tuxedo, in a wetsuit. I’ve also seen him with nothing on at all. Yet the sight of him dressed up now makes my mouth go dry.

Don’t wait for me.

The words ravage my brain. Reminding me that he didn’t choose us. He chose the approval of his parents instead.

I look down, studying the wood grain of the pews like I’m going to be tested on it later.

A lady in black robes approaches us. She’s in her mid-fifties, with closely cropped grey hair. “Abbot and Ramsey family?”

“Actually, it’s Abbot, Ramsey, and Dayton families,” Mum says. “But the Ramsey’s aren’t here yet.”

“I’ll take whoever I can get.” Her smile is warm. “I’m Judy, the minister here. I just wanted to talk to anyone who is taking part in the ceremony.”

“Chris and I went through the proceedings the other day,” Kate says. “And I need to change Ethan’s diaper. Why don’t you guys go with Judy now? I’ll send Chris’s parents when they arrive.”

“Okay,” Mum agrees.

Because the universe likes screwing with me, Kate has asked both Cody and me to be Ethan’s godfathers. Mel is godmother. Mum and Frank as grandparents are also part of the ceremony. So it’s this awkward little group that follows the minister into a room off the side of the church.

As I walk in, I notice a sign on the opposite wall proclaiming,God is love. Yup, Judy will need all the love God can provide to handle this group.

Judy waits patiently until we’ve all shuffled in and taken a seat on an assortment of plastic chairs. Cody sits as far away from me as possible. It’s probably deliberate. I have to swallow down the hurt that’s clogging my throat.

“Kate and Chris have asked for a nontraditional christening service, so I just wanted to talk through what will happen,” Judy says.

Yeah, 'cause I’m so familiar with the traditional christening services. I manage not to say this though.

She explains what each of us has to say and when. It doesn’t sound too hard. Except the part where Cody and I have to stand next to each other and reply at the same time. Like we are one unit. I tighten my fist, and my nails dig into the flesh of my palm.

Everyone is well behaved as Judy talks. Mum and Frank smile and nod, acting like typical doting grandparents.

I sneak a glance at Cody. His hair is longer now, the same length as it was over summer at the beach. I try not to think about how soft his curls are, how many times I’ve run my hands through them. While I’m looking at him, I catch Cody side eying me. I quickly glance away.

“I’ll just see if the other set of grandparents are here yet,” Judy says, heading for the door.

Leaving Frank, Mum, Mel, Cody, and me there.

Mel bites her lip. I pretend to have developed an intense interest in the swirly pattern on the carpet to avoid looking at Cody.

“What christening gown are they using?” Frank asks abruptly in the silence. In the chair next to me, I can feel Mel stiffen.

“I think Kate decided to go with the Hill family one,” Mum says.