Page 55 of Playing for Keeps
“Do you think I’m spoiling him?” Ethan’s voice had a note of concern in it. I snapped my gaze to him. His forehead was creased, his full lips pinched into a straight line.
“Nah, you’re not spoiling him. You’re creating some great memories.”
“Yeah, there weren’t exactly people queuing up to organize Easter egg hunts for me.” Ethan scuffed his foot along the grass, digging his heel into the lawn, not looking at me. “You gave me half your stash once, remember? Mum had just gotten out of hospital and she hadn’t had time to buy me any, so you shared your haul with me.”
“I don’t remember.”
He raised his gaze to mine. “You did. Shit. I took for granted all those little things you used to do. I never noticed until you weren’t there doing them anymore.”
There was so much affection in Ethan’s green eyes, I was forced to take a step back.
I couldn’t handle him looking at me like that.
I also couldn’t handle looking around the yard and seeing this overblown party for what it really was. Ethan trying to give his son everything he hadn’t had as a kid.
A lump rose in my throat.
I’d only had glimpses into what life was like for Ethan growing up, but those glimpses had been enough.
There was the time we’d gone to his house and had to tiptoe quietly through the lounge to get to his bedroom because one of his mother’s boyfriends—I could never keep them straight in my head because they changed so frequently—was in an alcohol-induced stupor on the couch.
Then there was the bruise on his hip that I’d noticed one day when we were getting changed for rugby practice. When he’d seen me looking, he’d given a shrug. “Freddie was stoned and I wasn’t fast enough.” I don’t know what was worse, the angry violet bruise or the casual way he had dismissed it.
Then there was the time he’d burned his wrist and come to me. I should have probably told my parents about some of this stuff, but after Ethan’s experience in foster care, the last thing I’d wanted was to see him go back. What if he’d been sent away and I’d never seen him again?
“You did so much for me back then,” Ethan continued in a soft voice.
“I was just being a friend,” I replied. My voice came out husky.
Ethan’s face contorted with emotion and for a few heartbeats we stared at each other.
I did it because I’ve always loved you, even back then.
For a second, I was worried he’d be able to read my thoughts, because it felt as if they were screaming in my head.
Ethan blinked and his expression cleared. “Do you know how friends are like condoms?”
“How?”
“They’re there when things get hard.”
I laughed out loud at that, and my melancholy mood lightened. It had always been like this for me, as if Ethan’s natural happiness was infectious. Some of his jokes weren’t even that funny, and I probably wouldn’t laugh if someone else told them. But it was the way Ethan told them, the way his eyes sparkled and his lips curled up, the total happiness he emitted.
I wasn’t a guy who laughed all that much, but it was as if Ethan had the master key to my sense of humor.
“Thanks for equating me to a condom,” I said. “Really appreciate it.”
Ethan gave me one of his sunshine grins. “Any time.”
I glanced up to find Char watching us. When she met my gaze, she turned away before I could read her expression.
“Were you and Char ever a proper couple?” The words were out before I could stop them.
“Nah,” Ethan said. He scratched his nose, looking awkward. “I mean, there was that one time obviously, but since then we’ve just been friends. We lived together for a while after Theo was born, but that was…you know, for practical reasons.”
My shoulders sagged with relief.
In my imagination, it had been so much worse. I’d known they’d lived together after Theo was born, and I’d imagined them as a couple playing happy families, my beautiful sister with Ethan and the gorgeous child they’d created together.
