Page 124 of Reckless Hearts
I remain standing, running my hand through my hair. Shit. Of all the times for this to come out.
Saskia takes a deep breath and leans forward, elbows on her knees, her gaze boring into me.
“So, how long have you been fucking my brother?” she says it almost conversationally, but I know Saskia well enough to know hear the edge underneath her words.
“A while,” I say.
“How long is a while?”
“We had a brief thing at university,” I say. “Then it reignited at your wedding.”
Her mouth drops open and she gapes at me.
“You and Seb had a thing at university?” she confirms.
“Yeah.”
“And you decided to reignite it yet again while you’re home this time?”
I shift my weight from foot to foot, my hands shoved deep in my pockets. “We’ve been doing the long-distance thing since your wedding.”
Now I’ve completely gobsmacked her. Her eyes widen to an almost comical degree, her mouth working soundlessly like a fish out of water.
“You and Seb? Are you actually fucking kidding me right now?” she says once she’s regained the power of speech.
“No. I’m not kidding.”
Her face works through a complex series of emotions. Shock gives way to confusion, then anger flashes in her eyes before her expression settles into a mixture of hurt and betrayal.
“Why the hell didn’t you tell me? All those conversations we’ve had, all those messages we’ve exchanged, you never once thought to say, ‘Oh, by the way, Saskia, your brother and I are a thing.’”
“Seb didn’t want you to know. I respected that.”
Hurt flashes across her face. She turns to stare at the closed bedroom door for a few seconds, then fixes her gaze back on me.
“I’m your best friend. If I told you to end it with him, would you?”
“No.”
She lurches back like I’ve physically struck her.
The word lies like a chasm between us.
“Do you love him?” she asks, her voice quiet.
“I don’t know. I don’t know if I understand what love is.” I rub my hand over my face, scraping my stubble. “But I do know he’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
Too late, I realize those are not the words Saskia needs to hear right now. Saskia’s used to being the glittering golden child. She’s never lost to Seb in anything.
Now, when she’s wounded, I’m telling her she’s lost one of her most sparkling possessions to her little brother.
Her shoulders slump. She closes her eyes like it’s too painful to look at me right now.
When she opens them, they shine with hurt.
“You’re not here for me, are you?” Saskia says.
“What?”
