Page 73 of Taming Ivy
“Oh, I have the right,” he growled. “Basford will experience the consequences of his actions.You. Are. Mine.You’ve been mine since I laid eyes on you at the Sheffield Ball surrounded by the damned Pack. The first time I kissed you, that afternoon in your music room, I bound you to me. When I showed you the universe in the palm of my hand the night of the opera, you bound yourself to me. As we lay beside that stream here at Bentley Park, I became yours as well. The night of the Faringdon Ball only sealed our mutual fates. Youaremine. If you require a moment to adjust to the idea, I understand. But, make no mistake, Ivy. You will become my wife as soon as a minister is procured.” Sebastian withdrew another document from a pocket on the coat draped across the back of his chair. He waved it at her. “Do you know what this is?”
“I don’t care to know.” Leaning against the pillows, Ivy closed her eyes. It was not pretense on her part. The laudanum was making her lightheaded and giddy. Besides, she was too exhausted to battle with Sebastian. Fighting him required all her strength.
“It’s the marriage license I obtained after the Faringdon Ball.” Dropping an octave, his voice became husky with emotion. “When I knew I could not live without you.” He laid it atop Timothy’s last desperate letter. Ivy knew an absurd desire to tear both in half. A lot of good it would do. Such childish endeavors would not deter Sebastian.
Fighting back a yawn, she said, “You don’t understand, do you, Sebastian? How could I ever trust you? How do I know you aren’t waiting to carve me up with your own particular brand of cruelty? I will not marry someone I cannot trust…no, I’m not marrying you.”
The laudanum worked its magic, dragging her deep into the downy depths of the pillows. Sebastian’s rugged face melted into a hazy mirage as a silky, warm lassitude slipped over her. Too drowsy to do much else, she frowned in disagreement while his words drifted like snowflakes around her.
His threat contained a gentle finality.
“How shall you explain your refusal, Ivy? Because I will tell everyone, anyone who will listen, that we are madly in love, that I have compromised you most thoroughly, and you are possibly carrying my child. Youwillbe my wife. I want you. I will have you. One way or another.”
CHAPTER 22
Agiggling maid set up a simple dinner for Ivy. Following that, a full bath was in order and although the effort was surprisingly draining, it was well worth it. An opportunity to wash away the memory of Brandon’s touch from her skin.
Ivy managed a smile when Alan poked his head inside her room. It seemed Sebastian was not coming to visit her and the disappointment annoyed her. From what she derived from the talkative maid, he had retired to clean up a bit and get some well-deserved sleep.
“He’d demand my head if he knew I was intruding,” Alan said, giving Ivy a wide grin. “I merely wanted to be sure you have everything you need.”
“I cannot thank you enough for your kindness, Lord Bentley. There is no better care than what you’ve provided.”
“We shall practically be brother and sister when you and Sebastian are wed, doubly so when Sara and I exchange our vows. As family, we must look after one another. But, your gratitude is misplaced. Sebastian has hardly allowed anyone else to come near you.” He winked conspiratorially at her. “It’s quite remarkable to see a man of his character so out of sorts. I thought I may need to knock him senseless just to have the physician examine you.”
“I would like to observe Sebastian being knocked senseless,” Ivy murmured.
“Well, don’t worry. There is something about you…it regularly puts him out of sorts. Plenty of opportunities abound to knock him silly. Your father, Sara, and Lord and Lady Morgan arrive tomorrow afternoon. You must be pleased they are bringing a few personal items for you.” Cocking his head, he remarked, “I know this is all moving terribly fast, my dear, but Sebastian, once his mind is set…I’m afraid he is not to be swayed.”
Ivy knew the earl’s flaws. Unfortunately, her father’s pending arrival only complicated matters. Jonathan would not understand her refusal to marry Sebastian, especially when he wanted her so desperately and she once wanted him with equal urgency. The possibility of a pregnancy further muddied the issue, to the point that screaming with frustration seemed a wonderful idea.
“I’ll say good night then.” Alan’s expression was sympathetic. “Do not fret, Lady Ivy. All will be well, you’ll see. Sebastian is one of the finest men I know, if you look past his unfortunate arrogance.”
Ivy nodded, throat tight with sudden, unshed tears. Alan closed the door behind him and the maid puttered about the room for a few minutes more, turning the lamps low before she exited the room as well. There was no dismissing the depths of loneliness swamping her at that moment, fear assailing her for what the following days might bring. Lying on her side, she watched the light from the fire cast gold, red and black shadows.
The chatty maid said the whole house was atwitter with the earl’s romantic actions. The girl oohed and aahed, relating how tenderly he took care of her, the concern he showed, the look of fear upon his features as the physician explained the effects of both physical and mental trauma, and how Ivy suffered both.
Ivy wanted to shriek with frustration and reveal everything Sebastian had done. The man was untrustworthy, his actions simply for show. Like images reflected in the still waters of a shallow pond, there was no substance to any of it, his words and actions meaningless and empty.
There was no escape from this impossible mess. Unless she bolted, as she threatened so many times in the past. To France. America. Anywhere other than England where marriage could be forced upon her.
Even as the prospect of running flashed in her mind, it was somberly dismissed. Sebastianwouldfollow her. He would never let her go now that he’d made up his mind to have her. There was no eluding him. Intense anger sizzled through her with that reality. It wasn’t fair. Once, she willingly gave him her heart. He carelessly trampled it. He did not deserve it a second time.
With the special marriage license, there was no need to elope to Gretna Green. Bentley Park possessed a lovely chapel and the wedding would take place in two days’ time. Her father was on his way. Her dearest friend and Sara’s parents would also be there, sharing what should be a joyous day. Their host was a gracious, kind man, deeply in love with the sister of her heart. And Sebastian vowed it impossible to live without her.It could be the loveliest, sweetest wedding imaginable, if you allow yourself to be part of it.
Ivy hated the insinuating weakness slyly suggesting she give into Sebastian’s seductive trap. It was so much easier than fighting him.
With the fire’s glow and the help of a turned down lamp, there existed just enough light to make out the curves of Ivy’s face. She lay curled on her side, one hand tucked beneath her cheek, the other folded beneath an elbow. Like little fans feathering cream, long, dark sable eyelashes brushed the tops of her cheeks. Her hair streamed across the pillow like chestnut hued banners in the wind. That mouth of hers, lips flushed pink, haunted Sebastian’s sleep. He was restless, pacing his room with the intensity of a caged animal. Driven from his bed to her side, he found it no use fighting what pulled him there.
Her slumber was peaceful and sweet, and raw emotion rose unexpectedly in his throat to choke him. When he slid onto the mattress, Ivy did not stir as it shifted to accommodate his weight. Slipping a hand through the hair at her temple, he smoothed stray curls back from her face.
She did not wish to marry him. That reluctance to place her life in his hands was understandable. After all, he’d done precious little to gain her trust but provided countless reasons to hate him. It was impossible to go back in time, to erase all the hurtful things, but he would make her understand he could not live without her. Life without her would destroy him. It would be a mere existence and nothing more.
Sebastian knew the instant Ivy came awake, although she gave no indication of consciousness until her eyes slowly lifted to his. In silent question, she regarded him. Taking her hand, he folded her fingers within his own. They were warm from her breath. All tension left his body with a simple realization.
She’s alive. I’m alive. And I love her.
“I did not love Marilee Godwin.” He pressed kisses to her knuckles. Her skin smelled of soap and lilies. “I’ve never loved another soul as I love you.”
