Page 9 of Party Animal
“You’re not coming with me?”
Lee’s face turned bright red.“I… uh, I think you misunderstood.”
“Never mind.I’ll walk.”
“Casey.Wait…”
I kept walking and never looked back.Bastard.I thought he might run after me, but of course he didn’t.Well, that was that.I vowed I’d never make another move on him.The ball was in his court now, but it didn’t matter to me one way or another.There were plenty of other fish in the sea.
Chapter Four
My sister always spent spring break with me and I always made sure nothing would interfere with our week.No shoots were scheduled, and I wouldn’t be going to the club.To be honest, I wouldn’t miss the drinking and I’d see my friends Easter Sunday.
I’m older, but my sister is an inspiration to me.She just finished her junior year at California State University, and I have no doubt she’ll reach all her goals -- a Masters, and then a Ph.D.in special education.She had her choice of colleges but she picked Cal State LA to be near me, and not because I supplement her grants.Julie and I have always been best friends and each other’s biggest cheerleader.
Neither of us had an ideal childhood.My parents bombarded me with bullshit.They thought they could heal me with prayer.Things weren’t much better for Julie.She has cerebral palsy.The doctors said she didn’t get enough oxygen at birth.Instead of getting her the therapy she needed, my parents prayed over her.Fortunately, Julie was only mildly affected, no cognitive disabilities, but there were problems with movement, balance and coordination.Still, our parents wanted to keep her isolated.They thought Julie should live a quiet, reticent life.Julie disagreed.She believed she could do anything she set her mind to.Her dream was to help children with disabilities.When I left home, I promised I’d help her make her dream a reality.
I parked in the lot and texted Julie.“I’m here.((hug))”
The doors opened and Julie limped down the ramp, cane in her left hand, and duffle bag in her right.I could see she was concentrating so she wouldn’t fall.I wanted to help her, but she always insisted on doing things herself.She spotted my SUV and came toward me.I can afford a sports car, but it’s easier for Julie to get in and out of this one.
When she got close, I jumped out and took the duffle bag.She gave me a big bear hug.“I missed you, Alek.”
Julie is the only person who calls me by my real name.When I was a kid, I read somewhere that if you discover someone’s real name you get power over them.Ever since, I’ve been careful who I divulge my name to.It’s just superstition, but Aleksander Vasko is my past.The world knows me as Casey Cox now, and that’s the way I want it.Julie’s given name is Julija, but she prefers Julie.
I returned her hug twofold.I don’t see her nearly enough.She’s always studying and I’m always working.“I missed you, too.”
I stowed Julie’s bag and helped her into the car.“Wanna stop for ice cream on the way home?”
* * *
Julie settled into her room and unpacked.Later, I ordered pizza for dinner.I poured us each a glass of red wine and we ate in the kitchen.We’re not typical siblings.We have a strong bond and we never argue.Julie knows what it was like growing up with our parents.She’s the only person who completely understands me.Sometimes I think she knows me better than I know myself.
Julie took another slice of pepperoni and gave me a cheeky grin.“So what’s new?”
I knew what she was really asking.Last week, I’d brought someone home.That’s my M.O.I feel more in control when I’m in my own space.The battery had run out in my cell and Julie called me on the landline.My hook-up buddy answered the phone and started chatting with her.That’s a no-no.I don’t want Julie exposed to my one-night stands.I was so pissed, my hard-on completely deflated and I threw him out.But it was too late.Julie had gotten the wrong idea.She assumed I had a boyfriend, and she started bugging me about it.
I played dumb.“Same old, same old.”
“Are you still seeing that guy?”
“What guy?”
“The one I spoke to on the phone last week.”
“Oh, him.It didn’t work out.”
“You’re too picky, Alek.Nobody is perfect.”
How do I explain that I don’t know how to be in a romantic relationship, one where I don’t have to do or be anything besides myself?“I’m not looking for perfect.I’m not looking at all.Work takes up most of my time.”
“I want more for you, Alek.You shouldn’t be alone.”
Jesus, I always feel like Julie is the older sibling, she’s so wise.“You have enough on your plate, Julie.Don’t worry about me.I have my friends, and I have you.I don’t need anyone else.”
Julie’s eyes glazed with a layer of tears.She blinked and one slid down her cheek.My heart sank watching her bite her lip to gain control.
“I do worry,” Julie said.“For a long time I worried about everything, especially what people thought of me.I hated my body, the pain, my limp… I wanted to be normal.Sometimes I was even jealous of you.Why is Alek the beautiful one, and not me?Then I’d hate myself for thinking like that.”
