Page 142 of Lessons for Marquesses
She started walking toward the riverbank. “So what are your plans? The October meeting at Newmarket? Palliard will be in fine form. And Nixey should be ready by spring. I’ve left my notes for you on the string, their times, the pedigrees, and such.”
From the corner of her eye, she saw him study her. “What are your plans?”
She had none, but she said lightly, “Oh, start anew. I have enough now, thanks to you, to demolish the west wing atChedworth if it does not collapse first. Perhaps you can come for tea some time.”
Her eyes stung with warmth. Would she someday see his wife, his children?
They walked in silence in what was a perfect July day. No clouds, azure skies, and a faint breeze carrying the scent of summer.
“Truly, you are welcome at Chedworth,” she said.
He stopped near a reedbed. A pair of ducks waddled into the water, furiously paddling afar.
“So.” She extended her hand, shaking inside and out. “I wish you every happiness, Nick. You do deserve it.”
He considered her hand under sweeping lashes. Ignoring her offer, he stared straight into her eyes like he had so many times. “Do you love me?”
She lowered her hand.
“Or was it just a lark?” He shrugged. “A fleeting sentiment? Does it pain you to be without me as it does me to be without you?” He pressed further. “Do you love me as I love you?”
“I love you.”
“Do you?” he shot back.
“How can you ask such a thing? That I am standing here, still breathing, is an astonishment to me.”
His gaze showed no mercy. “Then why are you offering me your hand? Why do you insist on putting a smile to this?”
“Because that is what I do. You of all people should understand what happens when I do not.”
He shook his head. He shocked her with a sudden laugh. “George, force a smile when I steal the bedcovers, when I throw my clothes upon the floor, when I make you stay in bed past six in the morning, when five years from now, I arrive home late for dinner.Thoseare the proper times. Not when a man stands infront of you, tells you he loves you, and can hardly breathe so much does he want to hear you say thatyoulove him.”
She watched in wonder as he stalked away and returned to consider her. “I love you, and I waited for you, and when I realized you were not going to come to me, I came here. Not to see you force a smile. And certainly not to be your neighbor or shake your hand.”
"Oh,” she whispered, tongue-tied.
“Do I deserve happiness?”
“Of all people, yes.”
“Did I not swear I would always love you?”
“I—Yes, I believe you did but love…” Love that overcame all was for poetry and Kitty’s novels.
“Will you do something for me?” He clasped her hands. “I want you to close your eyes.” He waited until she did. “I want you to imagine our lives, if what had befallen us, hadn’t. If we had met, would we have fallen in love? Are we right for each other? Do we not have more in common than we have differences?”
Georgiana opened her eyes. The confidence of his love shone back at her.
“Close your eyes.”
She slid them shut.
“What if we fought for us, forgave ourselves? What if we put this behind us and are richer for it, stronger, more sure of our love for what it has had to surmount? If I am deserving of happiness then I cannot let you go. Just as I could not let you go on the castle wall. I would rather die trying to save us.”
She felt him slip a ring upon her finger. “This ring has not the sway of the Margate Ruby. I had to use the biggest guns then. But this is strong and true, like us.”
He kissed her mouth tenderly, the feel and taste of him so familiar and intense she thought he might never have left. “You can open your eyes now.”
