Page 168 of Serpent In White
“No, I didn’t.”
“Not in so many words.” I shrug. “And second of all, isn’t that your thing?” This time both brows move. “Murder…?”
He lets out a deep, rumbling laugh, more subtle than anything, but it’s somehow one of the greatest sounds I’ve ever heard come out of a person. “You have interesting ideas about me, kitty cat.”
Suddenly, he’s on his hands and knees, crawling, inching closer to me slowly. I’m already up against the wall, so I have no place to go as he cages me in.
“I saw you…” I murmur. He grabs my ankle and tugs me until I slide down onto my back. “I heard your memory. You told me… you kill people.”
“I kill people who need to die,” he mutters, hovering over me while breaths fly in and out of my lungs. His snake eyes are shimmering down at me, and as freaked out as I am, I can’t deny the clenching happening between my legs.This is so fucked.“There’s a difference. But you, little stray kitten… you certainly don’tneedto die.”
My lips shiver through the words, “H-how do you know that?”
“I can feel it,” he says softly, leaning in, that scent of him intoxicating me until I feel drunk. “You were up on that clearing and youlived.”
“Because of Abdiel,” I croak, my head spinning.
He shakes his. “No. Because of you. This is your Ecdysis, Rhiannon. Here, on our land, is where you’ll get your life back. But you must want it.Andyou must deserve it.”
For every ounce of confusion bubbling inside me, there’s twice as much realization. Understanding.
Somehow, I get what he’s trying to tell me. I’m not sure how, but it’s not lost on me that of all the wilderness in the state of Washington, I found my way onto the Expanse. I met Abdiel in that clearing. He saved my life.
Taking those drugs was like a religious experience. Maybe I was meant to witness that murder…
Maybe it has something to do with the vision of him I had…
“I fucked up,” I whisper up to him while my heart gallops in my chest. He nods in agreement. “These people… your family… they follow you and Darian for a reason. I think I see that now.”
“They followhimfor a reason,” he mumbles, something serious flashing in his twisted eyes.
“No.” I shake my head. “Both of you.”
Making a snap decision, which for the life of me I can’t even understand, I reach forward, my fingers grazing his jaw. He actually flinches, which brings a rampant heat to my gut.
“Take back your control, stray,” he rasps, only an inch from my face. “It’s why you’re here.”
My heartbeat is booming inside me, my stomach twisting up. I can think of many things I’d like to do to regain control of my life, after what I’ve been through.
Or I can stop thinking. Stop rationalizing.
Stop making excuses.
And fuckingtakeit.
My lashes flutter, and just as I’m about to pull the Serpent’s lips down to mine, he hops off me, rises to his feet and stalks out of the cell.
I’m still lying on the cold floor, breathing like I’ve been underwater for ten minutes while the door locks and he disappears.
abdiel
I think I’ve walked about fifty circles around Darian’s bedroom by the time he comes upstairs.
He slides into the room, stealth even with his stature, like a panther. And when he closes the door behind him, he leans up against it as his eyes droop, breathing long and slow. Ifeelhis angst.
I wish I could take it from him. Hold it, bear his burden. I would do that for him, and I realize it’s a symptom of love I have felt before, though never truly this heavy.
In this moment, I would do any and every possible thing to keep my King happy.
