The problem, though, is that my dick is beyond hard right now. It’s like a rock.
This could just be a morning wood type situation… But something about that thought doesn’t feel right. And now my entire life since puberty is flashing before my eyes.
I developed later than most of the guys we know. I was fourteen when I shot up to almost six feet, and then I still didn’t stop until pretty much this year. While everyone else has been thinking and talking about sex for years, for me it only just started.
So maybe I don’t know what I like… Maybe I could like guys, too.
In this moment, for sure, the feeling of Darian pressing his hard dick into me is euphoric, in an uncomfortable kind of way.
And then I remember something he started saying earlier, in the diner.
I convinced myself I liked it. I sort of did…
He thought he liked what that asshole did to him… That prick probably justified what he was doing, making Darian think he enjoyed it because his body responded.
Is that what I’m doing now??
No no no. We’re not like that. He’s my brother and my best friend.
I need to stop him. Wake him up before something bad happens.
I try to roll away, but there’s no room, and I end up rolling right off the bed. And unfortunately, we’re so tangled that Darian comes with me, landing on top of me on the floor.
“Fuck,” I grunt, breathlessly because he sort of hit my balls a little with the fall. They’re aching something fierce now.
Darian blinks himself awake and looks around. “What the hell happened?? Why are we on the floor?”
“Um, we must have… fallen.” I can’t help sounding like an idiot. My face is warm as fuck, and it doesn’t look good. My cock is still hard, and so is his. They’re just resting together like old pals.
Darian notices fast and backs up. And when he does, his erection drags on mine, and it feels so fucking good I can’t help the little gasp that flees my lips.
He looks startled, glancing between us at our dicks, then back up to my flushing face. And rather than moving away or looking horrified, he does something completely unexpected.
He does it again.
A pleasure unlike anything I’ve experienced before, with someone other than my hand, rushes through my loins, and I bite my lip to keep in any more embarrassing sounds. His eyes are twinkling down at me, his lips looking especially full and pouty while his tongue swipes the bottom.
He presses his hips into mine, and this time we both groan, quietly, watching one another without saying a word. My entire body is balmy. Burning hot, in fact. So much so that I’m sweating through my clothes, but I can’t stop myself from rutting upward to get more of whatever this incredible friction is.
I never thought another hard dick rubbing mine would feel so good, but it’s delicious. I don’t want to stop.
That is, until Darian leans forward, and for one brief, terrifying moment I think he might kiss me. And the thing is, even though I know it’s probably a bad idea, and it scares the shit out of me, my eyes close, and I await the feeling of those soft lips on mine.
But it doesn’t happen. Instead, he nestles his face in my neck and shivers. “I can’t… I can’t stop thinking about it.”
I already know what he’s talking about. He doesn’t need to elaborate.
My heart, regardless of how black and blue, how diseased it is in my chest, is still breaking for my brother as I wrap my arms around him, holding him tight.
“I’m sorry…” he whispers, and I just squeeze him tighter, silently telling him to shut the fuck up.
No apologies. Ever.
We lie on the floor for hours, until sun peeks through the curtains of our hotel suite, just breathing, my hands brushing his back, combing through his hair. Comforting him, trying desperately to put him back together with the love that asshole stole.
After a while, he whispers, “I read about this lake in a magazine once… in Washington state. It’s by a mountain.” His voice holds a certain amount of wonder I hope will always be there when he speaks. “It looked like magic.” He lifts his face to peek down at me. “We should go there. You can have your mountain, and I can have the lake. We can go there and forget about everything else. We can start a new life.”
Gazing up at him, my fingers slip down to his chest, feeling his heart beat calmly beneath them. I count each one, each thump of his pulse until it’s time for me to nod.