Page 80 of Serpent In White
Drake said that last night, Abdiel thinks. “Is Drake the only person you’ve been with?”
His question catches me off-guard, and I freeze, my mouth hanging open as I gape at him. He immediately backtracks.
“I’m sorry. That’s none of my business.” He shakes his head. “I shouldn’t have asked. Forget about it. I’m so sorry.”
“Abdiel.” I take his face in my hands. “Stop apologizing. I don’t want you to fear me, baby. I want you to feel comfortable enough to ask me things…”
Guilt gnaws at me inside, despite what I just said, and I focus on blurring my thoughts, sending them as far away as possible. Just for now…
I know someday I’ll need to tell him the truth, about the other two people I’ve been with. The one I wanted… and the one I didn’t.
Abdiel nods at my words. “You’re perfect.” He kisses me softly, and I’m melting inside. “I wish we didn’t have to hide.”
Great. More guilt.“Me too, baby. I’m so sorry I’ve dragged you into this…”
“Please,” he scoffs, grinning. “I’ve had a crush on you for years. You’re not dragging me into anything I haven’t been willingly dreaming about since basically as soon as I hit puberty.”
Swarms of rampant delight overrun the guilt. I’ve never felt anything like this… Maybe once. A long time ago…
We spend the next two hours kissing and touching.Everywhere.
On the bathroom counter, on the floor, in the shower, in the bed… No spot on Abdiel Harmony is left untouched, no area ignored by the exploration of my kisses.
We don’t go further than sucking and jerking, because I was serious when I said that losing his virginity is special. I don’t want it to happen rushed while we’re watching the clock, wondering when someone will knock and remind me it’s time to get up and be a leader.
The first one comes at nine-thirty, which is already hours after I would normally get up. Typically, people know not to bother me when I feel like sleeping in, but even this is excessive. They might just be checking to make sure I’m not dead.
I bark at them through the door that I’ll be out shortly. And then an hour later, they knock again.
“Dammit,” I croak, my voice hoarse from all the hushed whispers and growls I’ve been giving the kid since last night. “I guess I need to get up.”
“You’ve beengetting upall right,” Abdiel rasps from where he’s straddling me on the bed, my head nearly hanging off. He’s still grazing my chest with his lips, but his movements are slowed and lazy from all the activities.
A seductive laugh rumbles from inside me while I hold his ass in my hands, loving the feeling, of him and of this. Us, together. Doing things we shouldn’t be doing and not giving a good God damn what anyone would say.
Though I suppose I’m still a coward. We’re in the privacy of this room, with the door locked. Would I have the guts to walk out there, holding his hand? Could I tell my wives I want a divorce because I’m gay and I’m falling in love with my servant?
I know none of them would care. They’re not in love with me, and they all have their own side arrangements, too. It’s not them I’m worried about. It’s everyone else…
“Stop worrying.” Abdiel kisses the corner of my mouth. “This just started. Let’s enjoy it. We can figure out the serious later.”
“You’re very wise, Prince Harmony.” I grin, kissing his lipsmore more moreuntil another knock on the door finally pulls us apart.
We get up and get dressed, agreeing that Abdiel will stay in the room for a few minutes after I leave, then sneak out the way he did last time. I search his face and thoughts for any unease regarding this arrangement, but I can’t find it. I have to take him at his truth that he’s not upset with me for not having the balls to throw caution to the wind for him.
I want to… But he’s right. This just started. We can at least see where it goes first, before getting bogged down in the future.
“Will I see you at dinner tonight?” I ask, clutching him like my lifeline I can’t possibly let go of. And much to my own shock and awe, he’s doing the exact same thing.
“I’ll be here.” He nods with his face buried in the crook of my neck, sniffing me like he’s committing my scent to memory.
Like we won’t see each other in a few hours.But actually… that sounds like a good idea. I’m gonna do it, too.Taking in a deep whiff of his scent, I’m crumbling. He smells masculine yet sweet, like amber and honey. Like an autumn day, falling leaves and crisp air. I’m obsessed.
“Are you cooking?” I lean up against the door with one hand in his hair and the other on his lower back.
He shakes his head. “Not tonight. You’ll have to settle with Ryle.”
“Mmm… shame. I love eating your food.” He chuckles, launching my heart up into the sky like a bird.
