Page 9 of Pull
I made Kelly come on my fingers, then she sucked me to orgasm between her soft lips.
And then I left. As simple as that.
I took an Uber back to my aunt’s apartment, took a shower, and got ready for my first day of classes.
And when I lied down in bed with a hard sigh, I wondered when this emptiness would cease. Picking up my journal, I flipped to the second-to-last page, gazing over the handwriting with my tired eyes.
My fingers brushed the paper, the words; feeling them.
Ben loved me. He loved me, but it was too late.
Wasn’t it?
“I should leave…” Ryan whispered, his voice all but trembling. It was so cute, I just wanted to kiss him all over his adorable, worried face.
“Baby, don’t be ridiculous,” Jess murmured, pecking him on the cheek as she passed by holding a tray of fancy cheeses, meats, and other assorted gourmet goodies.Charcuterie, she called it, I think.
Whatever. Just a bunch of stuff to distract our friends from the inevitable freak-out.
On the outside, tonight seemed like just a regular Thursday night dinner at our house with our best friends. But in actuality, this night was likely to be one that none of us would soon forget.
Because we had invited them all over to finally tell the truth.
We’d been dodging our friends for all too long. We hadn’t even seen them since before I left for Boston, and we’d been avoiding their calls since we got back from Thailand, so it was definitely time. We couldn’t leave them in the dark any longer.
So Jess, Ryan and I were hosting this dinner party together to come clean about how we’d gone from a regular old married couple to a polyamorous throuple involving our daughter’s ex-boyfriend.
Pretty much everyone else in our lives knew at that point. We had just told Hailey last weekend. And all things considered, she took it pretty damn well.
Naturally she was confused. She was hurt that we had been lying to her, and she was baffled at how our bizarre relationship with her ex even came to be. She could obviously understand how something like that might happen with maybe one parent… But with both of us?
It was beyond strange. Honestly, the whole thing was straight out of the movies. Sometimes I could still barely believe it myself.
We left Hailey last weekend feeling content after finally admitting the truth of the situation. Fortunately she didn’t want many details, so me throwing myself off a bridge out of awkwardness wasn’t necessary. She seemed placated by the simple fact that we were happy; that our love was so overpowering, we wouldn’t have been able to give it up, which was why we brought Ryan back from Boston and moved him into our home.
She was accepting of all that due to one main factor: Hailey believed in true love conquering all.
My daughter was a romantic. She loved reading those books… The ones with the shirtless guys on the covers. I used to think they were smut, but she’d argued with me over the years that they were all love stories, and that she loved the fairy tale aspect of it, even in the ones that weren’t about knights and princesses. She told me that even the dark love stories had happy endings, and it made her heart full.
She could tell from Jess and I confessing the truth about our relationship with Ryan that we had foundourhappy ending. It just happened to be one very different than your standard romance. But I admired our story. Hell, I wasproudof it. We were different.
Our relationship was as real as one could get. We were married, after all. But barring that fact, the three of us didn’t like to label ourselves. Ryan had started referring to himself as bisexual, because he was attracted to both men and women, although he still swore he had never even looked at another guy before me. I sort of like that…
I, on the other hand, chose to call myselfpansexual, if I had to pick a word. Because I still hadn’t really found myself attracted to men who weren’t Ryan. He was the only guy I looked at. And while I’d definitely checked out women other than Jess, I certainlywasn’t attracted to another man in that way. And pansexuality was the attraction to anyone, based solely on your feelings for that person, and his, her, or their soul; the gender having nothing to do with it. I liked that concept.Love is love, no matter what it looks like.
I wasn’t sure if I’d ever be attracted to a man other than Ryan-never say never right? But for the foreseeable future, he was it. He and Jessica were my everythings. My lovers, my friends, my confidantes, my partners in crime.My husband and wife.The two people who made my heart beat faster and my insides tingle with every notion of excitement I could relish. They were my world.
Them, and my kids.
Speaking of kids, this was the other reason whytelling our friends the truth now was so important. Jessica was due in less than two months. Everyone would want to be around to see the baby once he graced us with his presence, and Ryan was here. He livedhere, and was preparing for a baby, alongside his spouses.
As much as our friends deserved to know what was going on, Ryan deserved recognition as our partner. We’d already spent too much time hiding him, and downplaying his feelings asthe fling. It was fucked up. We wanted to show him off.After all, he was sharing his life with us. It was about time we started sharing ours with him, too.
Our friends are going to completely lose their minds. It’s just a fact.
Wrapping my arm around Ryan’s waist, I pulled him flush against me. His eyes were wide, his forehead lined from the unease. I couldn’t resist. I kissed the smallvbetween his brows.
“You’re not allowed to leave, husband,” I crooned, moving my kissing to the hallow of his neck as his rapid pulse thrummed on my lips. “You already said, ‘I do’. There’s no turning back now.”
