Page 182 of For the Fans
Why would you think he’d ever want you?
The noise of the crowd shouting and hollering for the other team swarmed me, growing so loud I was downright quaking.
My lungs were tight as I closed my eyes and shook my head… “I’m gonna lose this game, bro. I don’t know what I’m doing… I think I’m h-having a p-panic attack…”
Guty’s fingers dug into my shoulders, and he shook me hard until my eyes snapped open. “Cut the shit, Nueve! That’s not you. You’re the best goddamn quarterback in the division, and you don’t go down without a fight.”
Those words stuck in my head, a memory shimmering… of Avi, dressed up in his stupid eagle costume, telling me the same thing.
“You don’t go down without a fight… Trust me, I know.”
The thought of it brought a shivering grin to my lips, and I huffed a small chuckle.
He looks like such an idiot in that mascot outfit… The way he does the Moonwalk and the Electric Slide. Such a damn goofball, I swear to God.
“It’s not over until it’s over,”his voice rung through my mind.
“It’s not over…” I muttered, straightening my shoulders. “It’s not fucking over.”
“Damn fucking straight!” Guty shouted, slapping me hard on the back. “Now let’s go fucking win this thing, baby!”
I’m not your baby…My grin widened, and I slapped my hands together, muscles stiffening with determination.I’m his.
“Let’s fucking do this!” I smashed my helmet into Guty’s while he growled back.
After that, I was on a mission. A mission to undo the mess I’d made of this game. Within thirty seconds, I sunk a touchdown pass to Guty.
On our next drive, another.
Everyone around me was freaking the fuck out, but for the first time all night, I was calm. I was in my zone… And every time I glanced at the sidelines, I imagined Baldwin the fucking Eagle over there doing his stupid hip-thrust thing. It made me laugh, and people probably thought I was nuts, but whatever.
I wouldnotlose tonight. It was the only thing in the world of which, at that point, I was fully certain.
With thirty seconds left in the game, we just needed to get into field goal range so Theo could work his magic. But I had other plans.
At the snap, I two-stepped, locking eyes on my best friend, the best damn wide receiver in the ACC, maybe in the whole division, as he took off down the field. He was like the fucking Roadrunner, sprinting like a maniac, breaking so far from theBuckeyes’s defense, there was no way they’d ever catch up to him.
And then I launched the ball like a fucking rocket blasting off into outer space, damn near dislocating my shoulder to send it sailing in a perfect spiral. It was a long-shot… The longest I’d ever attempted.
But it sloped right into Guty’s reaching arms at the ten-yard line.Eighty-two yardsup the field. And he jogged his way into the end zone to win us the game.
What an incredible high, man.Coming back from one of the most disastrous games I’d ever played, to throwing the longest touchdown pass, not only of my career, but of the season as a whole… One of the longest the league has ever seen. Smashing all kinds of records. It was the biggest rush of my life.
But when my thrilled gaze flew to the sidelines, he wasn’t there…The mascot.
And my smile faded a bit, homesickness setting in with some other things… Regret and unrest. The win would have felt much better at home, that was for sure.
But in the moment, I pushed past it enough to focus on celebrating with my teammates. We would play for the Division I Championship.
Just one more big victory calling my name.
We had some fun last night in Ohio, but it was agreed upon by all that the real partying would commence when we got back to Boston. Guty and I are throwing a huge party tonight in our dorm. In fact, the entire floor will be raging as a whole.
And I’m excited, yes. But I’m also racked with the same anxious uncertainty that’s been plaguing me for days.
I haven’t talked to Avi at all since our fight. Not a word…Radio silence.
Dozens of times over the week leading up to the game, I considered going over there to see him. To apologize for walking out when I know all he wanted was for me to stay.
