Page 94 of For the Fans
But I can’t stop seeing him. I can’t stop thinking about all the little details missing from this supple creature.
“Go away…” I rub my eyes hard with my fingers. “I don’t want you.”
Lexi pops off my dick. “Ky, are you feeling alright?”
Shaking my head, I mutter, “Uh, yea… No…” I scrape a hand over my face. “I don’t know.”
She stands up, taking the bottle before it slips from my fingers. “We can just go into the bedroom if you want…” Her small hand runs up my chest. “You can fuck me from behind—”
Pulling back, I stumble away from her. “No. No, I’m sorry, babe. I’m actually not… feeling well.”
Turning before I can embarrass myself any further, I head for the door.
Fuck this. It’s fucking hopeless.
I’m broken.
Damaged.
He fuckingruinedme.
“Kyran, wait!” Lexi shrills after me, but it’s too late.
I’m already out the door, stalking away. Running away.Again.
I’m fuming as I leave Vanderslice, marching through the chill of December air. My blood is boiling, fury weaving through every cord of muscle in my body. I’m half-cocked between vibrant rage and drunken belligerence, which is a bad combo. Because nomatter how hard I try to overcome it, they both bring me to the same place…
Thomas More Apartments, room 446.
My fist slams three times against the door in rapid succession. Jagged breaths flutter my chest, jaw ticking at the sound of footsteps on the other side. It opens a crack, the iridescent gray hitting me as the final strike of a match tossed onto a bonfire soaked in kerosene.
His lips part, but before he can even try to make some sort of remark, I barrel inside and tackle him to the floor.
Avi lands beneath me with a grunt and my hands immediately circle his throat.
“You fucking ruined me!” My fingers dig in as his hands fly up, attempting to hold me back. “This is all your fault!”
“W-what??What’smy fault?!” he croaks, struggling out from under me.
But I pin him down with my body weight, shooting unbridled frustration at him through my eyes. “Everything! All of it.” I’m smoldering, burning up beneath my clothes as his hands grip my forearms, trying to pry them away from his neck. “We shouldfuck sometime??Are you fucking kidding me?!”
“Kyran… Calm down,” he chokes, his face turning red from my fingers cutting off his air supply. “We can talk about this…”
“I don’t want to talk to you,” I snarl, leaning over his face.
He blinks. “Then what do you want to do?”
“I want tokillyou,” I hiss, emotions taking over, the hate, weakness, and confusion mixing together like a lethal combination of chemicals, flooding my system. “I want to destroy you like you destroyed me.”
“How did I destroy you??” he grunts, using all of his strength to push my arms back; hold my weight from crushing his throat.
“With your stupid fucking ideas,” I teem, suddenly exhausted.Tired… So, so tired of fighting.“Your bullshit plansand your asinine fucking rationales.Yougot me into this… You and yourfucking mouth.”
Sighing out of hopeless despair, my grip around his neck loosens and my forehead crashes onto his. I feel depleted, like there’s nothing left. I’m just so tired, I could collapse.
Avi doesn’t move. He stays lying on the floor beneath me, his hands sliding carefully from my forearms onto my hands. He moves them off of his throat, down onto his chest, sucking in a long breath of air as my body drapes over him in surrender.
“You fucked me up…” I whisper. “I couldn’t get hard.”
