Page 209 of Phobia
He rolled back over to face me and wrapped me up in his arms. “About what?”
I watched a pair of headlights trail along my bedroom wall as someone turned onto our street. The light disappeared as the sound of the car faded.
“Everything that happened keeps replaying in my head.”
Air from his heavy sigh fluttered across my face. “It’s not your fault, Graysin. And I’m fine. I’m right here. With you. We’re okay.”
“No, it’s not—that’s not what I mean.” I shook my head. “It’s about Blaine.”
“Oh? You…you miss him?” His arms tensed around me, and I wished for a way to make it better. But what I was about to say might have the complete opposite effect and make him turn away in disgust.
I took the direct approach, and just spit the words out without preamble. “No. No, I don’t miss him. I’m glad he’s dead.” I sat up and intertwined my fingers tightly, and rubbed at my palms with my thumbs, one at a time. I stared down at Kellen. “What kind of person does that make me? To say that I’m glad that a guy I essentially grew up with is dead. Our friendship may have been a sham to him, but he wasmybest friend for many years.”
Kellen placed a hand over mine. The firm pressure stopped my fidgeting. Instead of disgust, I was met with compassion. “You’re one of the strongest, bravest men I know.”
“Thank you,” I whispered.
We sat in silence for a moment, until he asked me a question that I too had asked myself.
“Do you regret not going to the police?”
I’d asked myself that same question in every different way, with every combination of words I could think of several times over, but my answer remained unchanged all these weeks later.
“As crazy as it makes me sound, no. I understand why they did what they did. I don’t feel violated by what happened. Well…” I paused. “No, that’s not true. Not entirely.” I didn’t want to go down the Demon path right now. It was a weird path that I sometimes had a hard time finding my way back from, and that wasn’t fair to Kellen.
“But you know what really bothers me about all this?” The realization was hitting me right now as each word tumbled out. “God, this is going to sound so fucked up.” I turned to him and laid all my ugly out on the table. “I’ve never had anyone in my life who loved me enough to seek vengeance against someone who’d wronged me, like they did for their sister. I wish I had that.” Tears prickled in the corners of my eyes. “My best friend turned out to be an extremely disturbed individual who’d been lying to me since we met. My family fucking sucks, except for my grandma. I love her to death, and she absolutely saved me when I was younger, but she’s not going to go out there,” I gestured vaguely to the window, “and do what they did. Because why the fuck would she?! It’s crazy!” My volume had increased, and I made a conscious effort to tone it down. “It’s fucking crazy,” I whispered.
“Graysin, I’m sorry.”
My brow wrinkled and my lips turned down. “For what?”
“Just…everything. Everything you’ve been through.” He sat partway up and pulled me back down with him. His arms felt like home as he wrapped them tightly around me. “And you know what? I’ll avenge you, whenever necessary.” I peered up at him through my teary eyes. He pressed a kiss over each one. “Someone kills you? They’re dead. Tossed into the middle of Lake Erie with concrete blocks chained to each of their limbs. Or maybe more toward the northwestern side of the lake because, you know, Michigan and all.” I cracked a smile, and he plowed right on. “Someone tries to injure you? Scaphism. May they rot in Hell. Literally.” That drew a snort out of me, and he held up a hand. Mischief shone bright in his eyes. “Someone dares to bring you an undercooked steak?” Though we were lying on the bed, he straightened his spine and looked me dead in the eye. “They’ll be forced to use disgustingly warm bed pillows every night for the rest of their life. That’ll teach the bastards to fuck around with you.” I burst out laughing, and his face lit up with a grin that stretched from his lips to his eyes and all the way into my heart.
“Thank you, Kellen. I…wow. You’re very creative. I take it back. It turns out that I don’t have any future avenging needs, because that might get you arrested, and I’d really miss your dick.” I smirked at the faux glare he gave me. “Besides,” I shrugged, “now that I think about it, Demon did break one of Blaine’s fingers in my honor. I’ll count that, and your dick will remain free for me to ride.”
Kellen chuckled. “Demon?”
My mouth pressed into a thin-lipped cringe. I hadn’t meant to use that name out loud, but here we were. “Yeah…black mask. I call him Demon. He turned out to be oddly kind, all things considered,” I mused. I shook my head to clear my thoughts. “Red mask is Devil.”
“Huh.” Kellen nodded. “Okay. What about the third dude? Blue mask.”
“Wolfie.”
Kellen began to cough, choking on his own spit. “Wolfie?” he managed to sputter between the coughing and the laughing.
“Yeah. The names popped into my head while they were kidnapping me, like literally in the moment, if you can believe it. Because priorities, I suppose.”
He brushed the trace remnants of tears from my lashes and smiled kindly. “That’s a little weird. But you know what? I love it.”
Bless this man for turning my spirits around and making me feel so much better. I was so thankful to have him in my life.
I wiggled out of his arms, rolled him onto his back, and straddled his hips. “And I love your dick.AndI believe I was promised some naked time with it. Here I am.” I stroked my own dick until it was fully hard. I could already feel the press of his erect cock against my ass, and I rolled my hips backward. “What are you going to do about it?” I pressed my palms to his chest and leaned forward until our lips just barely touched. “Fuck me. Now,” I demanded in a throaty whisper. Then I sat up and waited for the aftermath of my sass.
Kellen’s eyes narrowed into dangerously thin slits, and a rush of excitement swept through me. My time ordering him around was going to be over in five…four…three…two…
He sat up and lifted me up by my waist. I slipped my hand between us and copped a sneaky feel of his taut abs.So fucking hot.
Before I could reach lower for his dick, he tossed me onto my back on the mattress and stretched his long limbs out, enclosing my body with his. His naked skin sliding over mine felt like heaven, although the thoughts running through his head were likely to land us in hell instead. At least based on the wicked grin he gave me.
