Page 62 of There's Pumpkin About You
He shrugs, trying to appear like it doesn’t bug him nearly as much as I think.
I hop into Gus’s bed and watch him expectantly, waiting for him to join me. He smiles shyly before unbuckling his belt, freeing it from the loops of his jeans with one swift pull.
If he wants nothing to happen tonight, he seriously needs to stop it with the hot guy moves.
When he pulls off his shirt, I can see the tattoos that I caught a glimpse of not too long ago. I tilt my head as I admire the view—the smooth, tanned skin stretched over broad, muscular shoulders and defined abs. I can see the effect that his broken arm has had on his physique. It’s softened the muscles a little since I saw him shirtless last, lessened the definition in a way that makes me want him even more. It reminds me that August Finch is human.
I realize now that if we were to take part in any… carnal activities, I’m not sure how Gus would manage with his broken arm. Various positions would be out of the equation, but I suppose it would give me a chance to do something that I’ve always wanted to do. Adam was never one for allowing a woman to take the lead, always afraid that it said more about his masculinity than his personality did. If Gus and I were to take that final step, were we to let that thin thread snap, would he allow me to take control of the situation, or would he be like Adam—old-fashioned and controversial?
I must have truly been in my own world, because all of a sudden, the bed shifts as Gus climbs in, wearing nothing more than a pair of boxer briefs. My tongue runs across my bottom lip as I imagine what he could possibly be hiding underneath his underwear.
I lie down, snuggling under the covers as I face Gus who does the same.
I’ve never felt such a contradicting mixture of ease and consternation before. I have this overwhelming urge to make sure that I am exactly what Gus needs in this moment and each moment after that I find myself in his presence. Yet, at the same time, I’ve also never found myself so comfortable just being myself—being both kind Wren and fiery Wren—without feeling insecure.
With any guys you dated, did you never get that feeling? That intense need to hide all the things that made you insecure so that he’d see only the best in you?
Is this what Bash was talking about?
“You look deep in thought,” Gus announces.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Of course you can.”
I take a deep breath to try and ready my nerves.
“Have you ever been in love?”
ChapterTwenty-Eight
GUS
The question has me tensing.
Feelings aren’t necessarily a topic of conversation that I strive to have.
“I thought I was once,” I begin cautiously. “I soon realized that it wasn’t love. It was more like lust mixed with a general liking for the person.”
“That isn’t love in your opinion?”
I shake my head as best I can whilst lying down. “Not the way my mom used to describe it. She used to say that it was something a lot deeper than that.” I smile as I remember the kind eyes and the soft smiles of my mother.
“She said that I’ll know when I love someone if I’m struggling.”
She looks at me, confused, and I chuckle softly.
“I know, but she knew me better than anyone. She used to say that love isn’t about statistics and facts, so I’ll know when I’m in love because I’ll struggle with how much I need to feel it and let it happen.”
Wren snuggles in further as she listens intently.
“One day, this girl came to town. Her name was Erica.” Wren’s eyes widen as if she’s heard the name before, and it doesn’t surprise me. This town loves to stick its nose where it doesn’t belong. “We met at the Locke and we got along easily enough. Unfortunately, this was back when I used to be naive enough to think that everyone was as kind as my mother was. We hooked up for a while, I even took her on a date or two and we generally just got along really well.”
“So, what happened?” she asks, squirming as if she’s preparing herself for the answer.
“Her mom met my dad and they decided to start dating instead.”
Wren’s eyes widen. “You’re kidding.”
