Page 21 of The Lost Art of Woodworking and Taking Risks
“Oh, wow, you’re a fast learner, and that was amazing. But if we keep it up, I’m probably going to do something totally embarrassing like come in my trousers.”
Oh. Chamis hadn’t thought about that. He was achingly erect too, but he hadn’t even really been concentrating on it, he’d just been enjoying the exploration.
“Sorry,” he said.
Bennan looked up at him, grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him a little closer so that he could press one more soft kiss to his lips.
“Youdefinitelydon’t have anything to be sorry for. That was wonderful, and I enjoyed it very much. But I don’t want us to accidentally go further than we’re ready for, all right?”
Chamis nodded, appreciating that Bennan had said “we.” He thought this was probably another benefit of Bennan’s experience, knowing when they needed to cool it down a little and give them the chance to just enjoy this, not too many feelings at once or too much for Chamis to handle.
“Thanks,” he said. “It was really, really good.”
Bennan grinned at him. “Yes, it really was. Would it be too much to ask if you wanted to have dinner together? I mean, sit in the dining hall together? I, uh, should have asked how you feel about being public about this. In the spirit of full transparency, I’m not sure I would be super good at hiding a relationship, but I can definitely try, if that’s what you would prefer.”
Chamis was already shaking his head. “I realize it will probably mean some looks and comments, and you’re right, I’m not totally comfortable with that. But I don’t want to hide what we’re doing—although maybe I don’t want to be quite as open as, say,Perian.”
This made Bennan laugh, as Chamis intended.
He continued, swallowing and reminding himself they’d said they’d communicate and be honest. “Everyone else knowing that I’m yours and you’re mine? I am absolutely looking forward to that.”
Bennanbeamedat him.
“Good,” he said, sounding so very satisfied. “I very much want that too. So dinner tonight? You and me? Next to one another?”
Chamis could only nod, because Bennan sounded really excited, and Chamis loved that he could arouse those sorts of feelings in the man. It was just dinner, but it was going to be new and different because they were specifically doing it together.
“I’m so excited,” Bennan told him.
Chamis smiled. “Me too. Maybe not quite as obviously as you. I’m excited on the inside.”
Bennan snorted, looking amused. “I’ll keep that in mind. All right, I’m going to go, let you have some no people time, and I’ll see you in the dining hall, right?”
Chamis nodded.
A moment later, Bennan was gone, and Chamis just stood there, still a little stunned. That had been… every single thing he wanted. How could it all be his now?
Chapter Six
He looked over at his carving of Bennan where it had been set down precariously on the edge of the shelf when Bennan had prioritized kissing Chamis. He moved to pick the carving up, running a finger over the smooth shoulder, thinking of the time he’d spent carving, burnishing, and waxing it until it was as smooth and beautiful as he could possibly make it—though he still felt it fell far short of the beauty of the man it had been modeled on.
He’d thought that carving was as close as he was ever going to get, only Perian hadn’t wanted them to be alone, so Chamis had made an overture, and Bennan had been so wonderful about seizing on Chamis’s efforts and expanding them, and… well, now here they were. Together.
Together.
It was a really nice word. Chamis was going to say it a lot more often.
He stared at his shelf, and then he spent a couple of minutes rearranging it until the carving of Bennan had pride of place. Maybe it would still be a bit embarrassing if other people saw it, but he wanted Bennan to know how much he meant to him. They’d agreed they weren’t hiding, so if someone else saw it, he could just confirm that it was his… partner? Lover? Boyfriend?
All right, so maybe Chamis still had some things to figure out about this relationship, but Bennan had assured him he could ask questions, and he shouldn’t expect everything to be sorted on day one, even if part of him really wanted that.
Once he was pleased with the rearrangement, he ducked around the screen and flopped onto his bed, staring up at the ceiling. He knew it was possible he was going to mess this up, that it wouldn’t work out. But in this moment, right now, with his heart feeling like it was so full it could burst, that negative voice simply wasn’t very loud.
Chamis was sure he wasn’t done with those thoughts forever, but it was still nice to close his eyes and just think about the positive things right now, like thekissing. It had to be pretty tame compared to what Bennan usually got up to, but he’d also been clear about how much he enjoyed it.
It was really… nice that someone took all of Chamis’s feelings into account, that they didn’t just want him to be different. He knew exactly what his father would say to this idea that he needed support and kindness and concession. But the man was dead, and his thoughts really shouldn’t matter anymore.
Chamis hadn’t realized just how pleasant kissing could be, just how many different kinds there were, from that gentle kiss to his finger to the press of lips to the exploration with open mouths and tongues.
