Page 46 of Stolen Mafia Vows
But what’s binding them all together and preventing me from melting into a sloppy puddle on the floor is how I feel about Eoghan.Love?Certainly, but I don’t think the word is huge enough for how I feel about him. Four little letters strungtogether into a word that’s exploited every February fourteenth when Valentine’s Day comes around, when my feelings for him are more powerful than anything I’ve ever experienced before.
“Babies have that effect on people,” Sienna murmurs from the bed.
She has a glow about her like a halo, and a fresh wave of guilt floods my chest. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here, Sienna. My phone died, and…” There’s too much to explain, and I can’t be the one to pop their perfect family bubble.
She smiles. It’s one of the things I like about Sienna: resilience is her superpower. She shrugs off the bad stuff, dusts herself off, and starts over, looking as fabulous as ever.
“Kyle made it in time.”
I glance at my brother who is obviously besotted with his baby son.
“I flew back early,” he says.
It must suddenly occur to him that it took me twenty-four hours to get here. The gentle smile is still fixed firmly in place, but there’s something else going on behind his eyes and making my heart thud.
“I’m glad I did, or Sienna would’ve gone through this alone.” I catch the first hint of accusation in his tone, smoothed out for the baby’s sake. “Where were you?”
I want to tell them the truth. I don’t want Eoghan to be a dirty little secret that I have to keep separated from my past life. I don’t want to keep spinning a web of lies that will only grow wider and stronger until eventually I’m the one who gets trapped inside. But I glance at Sienna who gives a barely perceptible shake of her head.
“I-I was with a friend.”
“Still camping?” Kyle has already returned his attention to the baby, his eyes brimful with affection.
I don’t answer, and he doesn’t seem to notice.
I straighten and hover midway between the visitor’s seat and Sienna. There’s a clear-sided crib next to the bed, packs of diapers stacked on top of a metal cabinet, baby wipes, and lotions, and a bag filled with baby sleepsuits, vests, and scratch mittens. The room is filled with that ‘new baby’ smell, and I suddenly feel like an outsider.
“How are you feeling?” I ask Sienna.
“Sore. So tired, I could pass for a zombie. Ecstatically happy.” To prove the last point, her smile escapes, adding an extra layer of glow to her face. “I can’t believe that Skye is here. But at the same time, it feels as if I’ve always known him. Does that make sense?”
I smile and shake my head. “Yes and no.”
On impulse, I give her a hug and whisper, “Sorry,” in her ear again. As I stand back, she glimpses the ring on my finger, and heat rises to my cheeks.
But before she can say anything, Kyle stands up and places the baby into my arms, so gently, I’m scared to move in case I do something wrong. I can hear the phone vibrating in his pocket.
“I’m sorry, Sienna, I should take this outside.” He’s already heading for the door. “I’ll be right back.” With one last longing glance at the baby, he opens the door, his cell phone already raised to his ear.
I focus on the baby’s pink face, the shiny closed eyelids, the faint bruising on his left temple from where he traveled through the birth canal, the lips parted to form a tiny O.
“It was the strangest thing,” Sienna says, unprompted. “The birth was easy, but being in labor… I’ve never experienced pain like it. Every contraction was like being hit by a bulldozer. I vaguely remember you calling me, but then one of the bodyguards came into the cottage, and it was all a blur after that.”
I don’t think she is trying to make me feel guilty, but I have a sickly sense of uneasiness that I know where this is going.
“I thought you told me that you’d gotten married.”
There it is. She heard me, but she has been too consumed—and understandably so—by the birth of her baby son to mention it to Kyle. Or to believe that she didn’t imagine the whole thing.
When I drag my eyes away from the baby, she is watching me closely, her expression unreadable. “I did get married.” My voice sounds thin, apologetic. “I was in Gretna Green in Scotland when I called you, Sienna.”
Her gaze settles on the baby, as if staring at her son will help her to concentrate. “You didn’t tell them about Eoghan, did you?”
“No.” I swallow the lump in my throat. “I’m sorry. I tried; I really did. But Kyle and Caleb were too busy to listen, and my dad promised to bust the kneecaps of any guy who came near me, and … I thought…”
“You thought that it was your decision to make.” Sienna completes the sentence for me, and I nod. “You’re right, Em. Itwas your decision, your choice, and you know that I’ll support you all the way.”
A tiny spark of hope flares inside me. At least Sienna is still on my side even if there is a ‘but’ coming.
