Page 24 of Mexico Can Choke On It
Rich people areso weird.
I count exactly seventeen ornate vases in this room. Breaking one would bankrupt me so fast, I’d have to auction off both kidneys, sell my eggs to science, work triple shifts at the bar, and still offer hand jobs on the side to make payments.
I scan my leather jacket for tiny red dots.Phew—so far, not marked for death by snipers.Though honestly, I’m not sure what worries me more: getting shot for standing here or staining this fancy rug with my blood.
My plan was simple: Deliver the cufflinks. Avoid Fiona. Get out.
Instead, I’m watching my brother and his fiancée in full soap opera mode, staging their little “discussion” about the sudden wedding acceleration.
“I thought you’d be happy, Gav-Gav,” Fiona says with a breathy little pout. “This is mydream. I’ve always wanted to get married at Casa Cashmere.”
He exhales, slow and measured. “It’s just… sudden.”
“I got so excited when they had a cancellation,” she says, eyes watering. “It’s fine. I already told them yes, but we can keep the original wedding date.”
I have to hand it to her—there’s a reason she was voted most dramatic in our senior class.
“Daddy will fix it. Cancel the helicopter parade and the underwater drone photographer. Tell the sand sommelier that we won’t be needing a curated barefoot walking experience. And I’m sure the bioluminescent jellyfish wrangler can release them back into the ocean.”
“I didn’t say no, Fi. This is… a big change. We need to talk it out. You know how important the next two weeks are for the company. Wetimed the wedding for after Heartvest goes public so I could focus on us.”
He pulls her close, and she nuzzles his chest.Nuzzles.I might vomit into the nearest vase.
To the outside world, Fiona is the walking definition of flawless.
But I know better. I know the truth behind the sparkle. I know theREALFiona.
The one who told our entire class I had chlamydia—CHLAMYDIA—and then passed out “Petra Protection Packs” with condoms and pamphlets like I was the poster child for abstinence.
Never in a million years did I think I’d have to endure Fiona Whitfield again.
Much less have her join my family.
“Fi, I want to give you everything your heart desires, but this one might not be possible. A wedding in one week is a big lift.”
“Don’t you think it would beamazing?“ she purrs. “Eight whole days celebrating us. Our love. With our closest friends.” She waggles her eyebrows. “I’m already picturing you in that little blue Speedo.”
“Okay, can I leave now?” I ask, raising a hand. “Or do I have to stick around and watch you twomate?”
“Petra, come say hello to Fiona.”
Oh, this sneaky bastard.That’s why he made me stay in this museum of ugly expensive crap. He knows I’ve been avoiding her since they started dating.
“Petra!” Fiona gasps. Before I can dodge, she’s wrapped me in a tight perfume-clouded hug. “Oh my gosh, I forgot you were here! Your brother… He makes me melt. Likeugh, how did I get so lucky?”
“Not sure. I’m guessinghypnosisor CIA-levelblackmail.”
“It is wonderful to see you!” she gushes, finally letting go. She holds me at arm’s length, scanning my outfit. “Look at this… creative ensemble. So brave to wear that to a formal event.”
“Thanks,” I deadpan. “I was going for ‘woman who’d rather be anywhere else.’”
Gavin clears his throat.
“Fiona’s been looking forward to catching up,” he says.
I snort. “Really? Because you’ve been engaged for six months, and this is literally our first conversation.”
“That’s my fault,” she says, pressing a hand to her heart like she’s pledging allegiance to the flag of bullshit. “I’ve beeninundatedwith wedding planning and my charity work, but that’s no excuse.” Fiona’s voice drips with manufactured concern. “Petra, I know we had our differences in high school, but I’ve forgiven you—and I hope one day you’ll—”
