Page 109 of Nodus Tollens
HAYES
Icouldn’t keep my eyes off Blue.
Not even for a second. I stood with my shoulder leaning against my bedroom wall and my arms crossed over my chest. Before we even set foot in here, I was amazed at how closely she studied each room I had shown her. She soaked in every detail, but it was her gentle, curious demeanor that had my heart hammering with emotion. I felt as though I was dreaming. Like she wasn’t real and that, at any moment, she would vanish from this room.
But she didn’t.
She wasn’t.
Not without taking me with her.
“Oregon Orchids.” She mumbled under her breath as she studied the poster I had of my favorite NHL team. Right next to my bed, it was one of my most prized possessions. Signed by Jaxon Mumford, it’s been hanging in that same exact spot ever since I was a young kid. I could remember how badly I wanted to be him. To have his skillset, speed, agility, fucking everything. On late-night conversations with Mal, we’d argue about who the best teams and players were and, without hesitation, I’d always say the Orchids. Mal would, of course, dispute it, but I think he eventually began to come to terms with the fact I was right.
God…I could remember how eager we were to learn back then. Staying up late practicing our shooting and stick-handling drills, we did it all. We wanted to be the best of the best. A hockey duo of the century. We wanted the fame and notoriety. Hell, I could even remember the time Mal and I went to see the Oregon Orchids play. My dad had taken us, and somehow, we were able to meet the players. I had already met Jaxon Mumford once, so seeing him a second time only made me more ramped up. More impatient. The first thing that slipped out of my mouth was how Mal and I would be his teammates one day. I was that confident, that cocky in my youth that I didn’t even realize that the man was already pushing his mid to late thirties and, by the time we’d get to the age of possibly being drafted, he would be retired. Jaxon didn’t laugh it off as a joke. He didn’t ruin the dream I had of playing with him. Instead, he gave me a response that has stayed with me to this day.
“I’ll be waiting.” He said.
A light smile formed across my face at the memory. Good memories that I would cherish forever, but now everything was changing. Watching Wren only signified the change in my path. A shift in what I wanted out of life. Hockey would always be a love of mine, but it wasn’t what I wanted.
What I wanted was for my dad to be cancer-free. I wanted Blue to live until she was a hundred years old and had lots of children. I wanted Mal to find his peace in life just like I had found mine. I wanted positive conclusions in all our lives instead of grief and sadness.
But just looking at Blue and that beautiful, content smile on her face, I was reminded of how lucky we were to have this. To have the moments we were sharing. I couldn’t ruin them with fear. Not when I knew that all it took were a few steps toward her, and I could have her in my arms.
“Is it weird that this is exactly how I imagined your room to look?” She chuckled while holding up a wooden box that I had made in high school. “Did you make this?”
I shoved my hands into my pockets and nodded. “Yeah, I took a few woodworking classes in school. I made that shelf over there, too.” I pointed to the shelf beside my dresser.
“Hayes, these are really good.” She said as if she was stunned to see that I was actually good at something other than hockey. Not that I was good at woodworking, but I enjoyed it as a hobby. I liked having the ability to create something beautiful out of essentially nothing. Unfortunately, I haven’t had much time to put into it. I hoped that one day I could get back into it.
“Thank you.” I watched as she softly set the box down and walked over to the shelf. Her hand lifted, and once again, with gentleness, she ran her finger along the polished wood.
“Do you have any more wood pieces?”
Suddenly self-conscious of the way she was examining my work, I shook my head.
“No, but I plan on making you something one day.”
I made my way over to where she stood and hovered just enough behind her that she could feel my presence at her back.
“You are?” She dropped her hand and peered over her shoulder at me.
“Yeah.” I laughed at her surprise. “Why is that so hard to believe?”
She then turned around, and I noticed her face had gone pink. A subtle shade, but there, nonetheless. I wanted to kiss the embarrassment away from her face.
“It’s not, I just… I’m still shocked that you made these, and the idea of you making me something...” She sucked in a breath and shook her head. “I can only imagine just how beautiful it will be.”
I don’t think I could ever make anything that would surpass Blue’s beauty. Even now, with her makeup-free face and those chestnut eyes, I was struck. Would I ever not be when I looked at her?
“I’m not that good.” I chuckled. “But I appreciate the confidence booster.” I smirked while leisurely grabbing onto her hip. Studying her reaction, I watched as her breath hitched at my touch. Her shoulders lifted, then slowly fell as she leaned closer to me. I loved the honesty in her response. The trust that I’ve gradually gained from her.
My stare swept up to her face, where I found her watching me. Eyes that told me I was everything and more stared back at me. A promise of forever swirled around in the depths of her gaze, and a longing for three little words to be spoken was present in her expression. The need to hear the confession pour from her heart overpowered me, but I knew I couldn’t rush her. I wanted to hear the words on her terms. When it finally became too hard for her to hide her feelings and she was no longer scared to admit that she had fallen for me.
And I know she has.
Just as easy and effortless as I had for her.
“And Mal?” She changed the subject as she brushed past me and made her way to my bed. “Where is he sleeping tonight?”
