Page 80 of Aftersome
Maybe it wasn’t just her who needed me.
28
WREN
Icouldn’t give a detailed reasoning of why I felt the need to jump into Mal’s arms other than the fact that I wanted to. I was desperate and tired and needed strength from someone other than myself. Although it was wrong, and entirely impulsive, I never wanted it to end.
It had been so long since I’ve felt safe like this. Held in such a tight hold that we were at risk of becoming one.
His large hand was splayed on the back of my head in a possessive hold while the other laid soothingly along my back. Everything about it was wrong. Being in such close proximity to him should have made my stomach churn in disgust, but all his presence did was make it more impossible to dislike him.
Guilty conscience or not, I needed him today.
“Shh…” he whispered against the outer part of my ear. “It’s okay. You’ll be okay.”
He wove his fingers through my hair and slowly began to massage them into my scalp. It was unlike anything I’ve ever experienced with Mal. This soft, gentle, caring side that I was so desperate to see and I was now finally getting to experience it.
I felt as though I was dreaming and at any moment I would wake up. So, I continued to keep my eyes closed, hoping and praying that this was real.
I needed it to be real.
“I’m here. I’m not going anywhere,” he promised, causing my heart to flip.
We remained locked in each other's embrace, soaking it all in as if this was the last and only time it would happen. Memorizing his scent, the feel of his arms and the way he refused to be the first one to pull away, I bottled it up inside so it would never be forgotten.
And maybe he was taking this time to do the same.
Or maybe he wasn’t thinking about anything at all other than the fact that I needed someone.
Hours could have passed and I wouldn’t have known it or cared. My tears had slowly wavered into soft breaths and the pressure of Mal’s hand on my head lulled me off into a semi-conscious state of peacefulness.
“If I ask you to do something for me, will you do it?” he asked as he slowly pulled away from me and met my gaze.
It was nearly impossible to not get lost in those eyes and not be affected. Worry marred his features, but it was nothing compared to the sincereness in his tone.
Unfolding right before my eyes was a Mal that the world had never seen. I felt almost honored in a way to be the one who conjured up these feelings and emotions inside of him, but it had also pained me knowing that he kept this side of himself so closed off. I wanted answers but I knew I could only handle so much right now.
Today I was fragile and at the risk of cracking at any moment, and Mal seemed to have understood that.
“Okay,” I muttered under my breath, and soon he was releasing his hold on me.
“Where’s your hairbrush?”
My eyebrows bunched together in confusion.
“My hairbrush?” I repeated.
“Yeah.” He nodded while scouring my room with his eyes for a brush. “Just trust me, okay?”
I had no other choice but to trust him. He was here when he didn’t have to be and that spoke volumes. Then nodding, I walked over to the small end table beside the bed where I pulled open the drawer and handed him my hairbrush.
Taking the pink brush in his large hand, he then kicked off his tennis shoes and climbed up onto the bed. My eyes went wide as I watched the oversized hockey player take up space in the middle of my bed where he sat with his back to the headboard and his legs spread out wide.
“Come on, Doe.” He patted the spot between his legs and I swear my own had almost given out.
“You want me to sit there?” I motioned with my head toward the apex of his thighs. Even in a pair of sweats, you could see the outline of his muscles. Way bigger than I remember him being.
“If you want me to brush your hair, then yes.”
