Page 50 of Into These Eyes
My whole body relaxes. He’s actually reaching out, trying. Stubborn old fart that he is, I hadn’t expected that.
Picking up the phone, I hand it to him. “See that smaller button on the side?” He looks at it and nods. “Press and hold it down.”
He follows my instructions, his face lighting up like the screen. “Well, will ya look at that. Now what?”
I get up, slide onto the seat beside him and begin his first lesson.
Once he leaves, I power on my own phone with dread. Sure enough, I’m greeted with a plethora of missed calls and angry texts from my Community Corrections officer. I call him immediately. I actually like the guy, he’s always treated me fairly, but even after I explained that I had to take care of a friend in need, it doesn’t change the fact that the poultry farm fired me.
With one of my parole conditions being that I hold down a job, he’s given me two weeks to find another, or I’m headed back to prison.
For the next few days, I search for work. Unsuccessfully. I try not to panic. I’ve been here before. There are plenty of shitty jobs no one else wants.
After dinner, I scour for work on my phone. When it rings in my hand and Jamie’s name appears on the screen, my stupid heart does a double-beat as I answer. “Hey.”
“Hi,” she says, a slight hesitancy in her voice. “I just … well, I wanted to say thank you … for the other night. And the morning. I’m not sure I did, so …”
“Anytime, Jamie,” I tell her simply. Because it’s true. She could call me for help every night for the rest of my life and I know damn well I’d be there. Although I might try not to lose my job while I’m at it.
While I wait for her to say something, I take in the clinking of cutlery on plates, the low murmur of a multitude of voices. She’s out somewhere. I can only presume she’s alone since she’s on the phone with me.
“So, how are you?” she finally asks.
“I’m fine. And you?” I groan internally at my riveting conversational skills.
“No,” she says, “I want to know, Gavin. That was … is some pretty big news for you. So, I really do want to know how you are.”
For a long moment, I can’t breathe. I just sit, unmoving, unable to form words.
“Gavin?” Her voice is soft, gentle, and a little concerned.
“No one’s asked me that, and actually wanted an answer, in a very long time.” How does she manage to extract little truths from me so easily?
“Well, I’m asking.”
“I guess it’s sinking in. The rush of it all when you told me, and now the reality that it’ll take time. Feels like I’m in limbo. But a good limbo, if there is such a thing. I’m not complaining.”
“I know. Nothing’s changed for you except for the fact we know the truth. Which doesn’t help you at the moment,” she says with empathy.
“True, but that’s the way it is. Thanks to you, where I am now is a million times better than where I was a few days ago.”
“And soon you’ll look back at this moment and realise your life’s a million times better than it is today.”
Damn. She knows exactly what I need to hear. “I believe you.”
“Good,” she says with a sigh. “Anyway, my dinner date will be here any second. I should go. Night.”
The call disconnects, leaving me gripping the phone so hard I’m surprised I haven’t cracked the screen. She’s on a date? While she’s grieving and trying to come to terms with her father’s confession? Of course she’s on a fucking date. Sure, she told me she doesn’t have anyone in her life, but that doesn’t mean she’s not out there looking for that significant other. My gut churns. I want to be the one taking her out, buying her dinner and making her forget about everything she’s dealing with.
I’m a goddamn fucking idiot to have ever let it cross my mind that she might see in me something more than a wrong she needs to right.
Chapter 19
Jamie
After I hang up, I take a quick look around the busy restaurant. Still no sign of Pete, so I go straight back to staring at the name on my phone. Gavin Lake.
His surprise that I’d really meant it when I insisted he tell me how he was feeling, had my heart constricting. My head’s still a bit of a jumble when it comes to him. I need to vanquish the opinion I’ve held for half my life and create something new. Already it’s becoming all too clear that I’m dealing with a man ofdepth and compassion. A man that the rest of the society sees as a useless ex-con. And will continue to unless I fix what my father has done to him.
