Page 57 of Into These Eyes
“Before you walked into that meeting, the only thing on my mind was trying to convince you of my innocence. Even my cell mate told me I was crazy if I thought I could do that. He said that wasn’t what you wanted to hear. That all you’d want was to know how sorry I was. I thought he was full of shit, that with everything I’d learnt, I could convince you it wasn’t me.”
I take a deep breath and wait for her to say something. She doesn’t. My chest constricts with the thought that I might be about to lose her help, but I push on.
“I was all set to bombard you with the truth … then you walked into the room. The moment I looked into your eyes, I knew I couldn’t do that to you.”
She frowns while she takes that in. “Why?”
“Because I could see you were still haunted by what happened to your mother, that it was almost as raw as it was when we were in court. You looked … stuck. And I knew, that by continuing to profess my innocence, I was hurting your soul, keeping you stuck. My cell mate was right all along. You were there to get closure, and as far as you were concerned, I was the one denying you that. I was everything that was wrong in your world. So, Idecided to put it right. I gave you what you needed so you could move on.”
She stares at me for the longest time. Finally, she shakes her head. “But the way you said it … the way you meant it … it felt so real, like you completely understood.”
“Of course I understood. I lost my own mother not long before you did. I knew everything you were going through, everything you’d lost. Because I’d lost it all too.”
She does that rapid blinking thing, and I know she’s holding back tears. Hoping to distract her, I grab her half-eaten burger, wrap it up and place it in its bag. “Come on, let’s walk this off.”
Apparently accepting my explanation, she nods.
After walking in the opposite direction along the river for a while, I say, “I was actually surprised you didn’t grill me about every little detail in that room, that you were satisfied with what I said. I think, if you’d pushed for more, I’d still be inside right now. Why didn’t you?”
Silence drags on for a long moment before she admits, “You took me by surprise. I was ready for a battle and you just … deflated me. Every word cut right into me. That’s all that seemed to matter. Going over the details felt so … clinical. There was nothing clinical about what you said to me. It felt right to leave it there.”
“And you still want to leave it there?” I ask gently.
She nods. “For now. I don’t think I’m … ready to hear it all yet. One thing at a time.”
We walk on for a little longer before she stops and faces me.
“So, you didn’t lie to me. But you did lie to the State Parole Authority.”
“I did. That part of it … I listened to my cell mate. And he was right again. Claiming my innocence never once worked for me.”
She shakes her head. “I get it. But … you’ve made it a hell of a lot harder to clear your name. What’s the court to think? Here’sthis man, wanting his conviction overturned, yet he’s officially admitted he’s guilty. You’ve handed them the fact that you’re a liar. You either lied about being innocent, or you lied about being guilty. Either way, there’s a lie in there and they’ll latch onto that. The court doesn’t like overturning convictions, so any excuse not to will do. You see where I’m coming from?”
My stomach drops to my feet. Why the fuck hadn’t I thought of that? Probably because I believed confessing was the only way out, and because I never imagined her father would tell the truth.
“Shit.”
“Yeah.” Her eyes search mine. She’s not even trying to hide her own disappointment. “I want to help you, Gavin but, as we agreed, I won’t lie to you. It’s not looking great. Unless there’s some solid evidence or another witness the police report doesn’t mention, then—”
“Thereisanother witness. That arsehole detective buried it.”
Chapter 21
Jamie
Ifreeze as Gavin’s gaze sweeps over my face. Though I can’t quite read his expression, something’s shifted inside him.
“You’re talking about Detective Jarrod Reid?” I ask, needing to be sure.
“Yeah. That’s him. The prick who led the investigation and made sure I was convicted.”
Moments ago, those blue irises had emanated warmth, now they reveal an anger so ice-cold a shiver runs up my spine and settles at the nape of my neck.
“Are you saying he knew there was another witness?”
“Yeah,” he says, his voice low with barely controlled rage, “he fucking knew.”
“It’s just … he, ah, was always so helpful, so kind during the whole thing. Even years later, he …” My voice fades away at the mask of stone staring at me, his eyes hard and unforgiving. I take an involuntary step away. The added distance lets me take in the fists at his sides, the muscles flexing in his arms.
