Page 74 of Into These Eyes
“It just makes sense,” she continues, as if she hasn’t heard me. “We’re going to have to spend time together to get everything done for your case. And with my workload, I’ll only have time for that after work. And, like you pointed out, there’s the time it takes to drive here, then drive home. And this isn’t the best working environment. It’s so hot, I can barely breathe, let alone think. We need more room … and I’ve got a whole house that’s empty. It just seems crazy not to …” she trails off when her eyes finally meet mine.
I’m not sure what she sees, because apart from being stunned, the stifling air seems to be caught in my throat.
I agree with everything she’s said. Although she’s right about my inconvenient location, and as much as I want to take her up on her generous offer, I can’t fool myself into accepting. She’s tried to present it as if it’s for her benefit, but I think she just feels sorry for me. And I don’t want anyone seeing me as a charity case or taking pity on me. Especially her.
“If you’re suggesting what I think you are, it’s not a good idea.”
“I disagree,” she says firmly. “My father was responsible for you going to prison, for you living here right now. He owes you. And since he’s gone, I owe you.”
“You owe me nothing, Jamie. Helping clear my name is more than enough. Above and beyond, actually.” If there’s eventhe slimmest chance she might see me as more than the guy her father fucked over, I have to prove I deserve her, that I hold something within me she needs. Having her believe she’s indebted to me makes me feel about as useful as a mozzie. If I accept her offer, that’s what I’ll be. Nothing but an annoying insect bleeding her dry. And that’s only one reason.
She shakes her head emphatically. “This place … it’s just another prison. If my father hadn’t done what he did to you, you’d have a career, your own house. Until we get your conviction overturned, a real home is the least I can give you. Please let me.”
The thought of living under the same roof has my body reacting in all sorts of ways that try to weaken my resolve. “I don’t think—”
“It’s no different from taking in a boarder. At least you’re not a stranger. It’s a logical solution, Gavin. To saynois illogical.”
“Not everything has to make sense.” What I really want to say isplease don’t push this, because I’m so close to caving, it’s pathetic.
“Explain that to me.”
“For one, don’t we have to keep this professional?” I point out, hoping that’ll make her come to her senses.
“Nothing will change. Except we’ll have more time to work on your affidavit, and you’ll get to live in an environment you deserve. You don’t belong here, Gavin.”
“I don’t feel like I do either. But you’re wrong about it not changing things,” I argue, realising she’s not about to drop this.
“Why? I can’t see—“
“What about your boyfriend or … whatever?” I interrupt.
She frowns in confusion. “There is no boyfriend.”
“Okay, but there’s a high probability that might become an issue at any given moment.”
She scoffs, like it’s the most ridiculous thing she’s ever heard. “There’s no danger of that. Whatsoever.”
“I find that hard to believe,” I tell her honestly. “You were on a date when you called me the other—”
“No,” she interrupts. “I was having dinner with Pete. He’s sixty-five and about to retire. He’s my good friend, a mentor. So, unless some amazing guy comes knocking on my door, it’s not an issue. Next reason?”
I could be that guy. The guy who knocks on her door. Shaking my head, I dismiss the notion almost immediately. She saidamazing guy. That, I’m definitely not.
But to live with her? Just being in her presence is too tempting. Well, even then, I haven’t managed to keep my hands off her. I don’t think I’d survive the torment of being under the same roof. The need to touch her, kiss her, ravish her would be impossible to resist.
Fuck. How the hell can I convince her without telling herthat.
So, I move on to reason number three.
“Jamie, you know how long I’ve been locked up. And how long Benny’s been inside. He needs me right now. I’m not sure if you can imagine living with someone that long, locked in the same cell for twenty hours a day. Then suddenly you’re alone. It’s like you’ve been ripped in half. Without that other person, there’s a gaping hole that takes a little while to get used to, then a little while longer to fill in. I can’t leave him here alone. He’s not ready.”
She stares at me, taking in everything I’ve said. The compassion in her eyes squeezes my heart so hard I want to take every word back and just tell heryes.
She opens her mouth, then closes it, trying to come up with a rebuttal, I think, but she won’t find one.
“Okay,” she finally says, nodding. “Of course. I … I hadn’t thought of that.”
“This won’t affect us working together?”
