Page 202 of Cerulean Truth
"I have to go," I answered in clipped tones. I quickly drew a portal and jumped through, while she stayed behind with all her unanswered questions. Again.
Fucking Eliot.
After all this time hunting for the mole, he'd been right under my nose! And then he goes and lures Emma out of Cyclos, out of her sanctuary, away from the protection against the Radicals. He was going to pay for that with his fucking life.
It took me less than a few minutes to reach his house, ready to confront him. As I approached, I found myself hoping, wishing for another explanation than the possibility of my friend being the mole.
When I stormed into his house, the truth hit me hard: Eliot had vanished into thin air. The inescapable conclusion was clear—my trusted Council friend had been the mole all along.
Immediately, I informed the Council and called for an emergency meeting, but before it took place, I returned toEmma. Talking to her was my priority; I had to make her understand and I made the decision to tell her everything—no more secrets.
When I arrived back at her dorm, she sat still on her bed, looking at me with expectant eyes as I shook my head, indicating I hadn't found Eliot anywhere.
And so, I told her everything—the truth about the Radicals, their motives for her "blood theft," the interrogations I’d conducted, the mysterious orchestrator behind the Radicals, referred to as a "him," which was all we knew, and our suspicions about the existence of a mole, now confirmed to be Eliot.
I also tried to convince her that I would never take, let alone test her blood without her approval and knowledge. Fortunately, she believed me when I swore that I hadn't.
But she was angry. "Gods, James, you promised me you wouldn't keep anything from me. Where the hell do you come off not telling me all of this sooner?"
"I should've told you," I admitted, the weight of regret settling in between us. "I should have told you they were after you for your blood, to thwart the Great Exposure. Maybe you could've..."
"It wouldn't have changed anything the night of my abduction," she reassured me, her voice carrying a mix of understanding and frustration. "It wasn't your fault. But I am angry you didn't tell me. You promised you would disclose anything concerning me or my life. How could you not tell me?"
"Because it's not just about you, Emma. It's the greatest risk we have ever encountered on an international scale—the greatest risk at war, at jeopardizing our exposure, at everything. But..." I hesitated, grappling with the realization of my shortcomings. "I should have prioritized you over it. And I'm sorry I didn't. I should have trusted you with the truth, no matter the consequences."
Emma nodded. "I know you've been through the wringer. I know you have trust issues, and I know you've learned to keep your secrets, both as a defense mechanism and now as our Leader-to-be. It can't be easy juggling all that information at once."
I blinked in surprise at her understanding. I reached for her hand, but she still backed away. A sense of dread filled my system.
"Yes, I understand, James. It doesn't mean I have to like it. I need to come first at some point, you know? This was aboutmylife. You can't keep anything hidden anymore about me, or I'm never going to trust you again."
"Emma, I solemnly swear, there is nothing left that I haven't told you yet. You are officially the person with the most intel outside of the Council."
She huffed, her anger still palpable. "For what that's worth... "
I swallowed, unsure of how to react.
"So, you didn’t find Eliot?" she abruptly changed the subject.
My rage emerged again. "No, the bastard left before I could haunt him down. But don't worry, I'll find him soon enough."
"Do you think there was any truth in what he said? That I might be adopted?" she whispered, angst flowing through her words.
"I don't know, Emma... I have no idea where he got that shit from, but we'll find out. Together."
Emma took a deep breath. "About that..."
My heart sank. Fuck, I wasn't going to like what was coming.
"I need some time to... process...everything," she said hesitantly.
I tried to ignore the giant pit forming in my stomach and nodded. "Of course, you've been through hell and back these last few days."
"Yes, and I would like some time to figure out the whole adoption thing on my own if you don't mind?"
What could I say? Yes, I mind? Screw the world; let it just be us against the rest of them? Maybe I should've said exactly that.
But what I said was, "No, I don't mind. I understand."
