Page 104 of Stalked By the Alphas
“Noah,” she says finally, looking up at me. Her green eyes are shimmering with unshed tears. “This is beautiful. But words aren’t enough. You know that, right?”
I nod, swallowing hard. “I do. I know we have a long way to go to earn back your trust. But I’m willing to do whatever it takes. I know I’ve hurt you, Hazel. I know I’ve failed you in so many ways. But I want to be better. For you, for us.”
Hazel’s fingers trace over the embossed letters of her name on the journal cover. Her expression is thoughtful, wary and something softer that I can’t quite place.
“Who are you, Noah?”
I frown deeply and instantly analyse that question but then I sigh and shake my head. “I’m just an alpha who’s hopelessly in love with you,” I confess. “Amanwho’s scared of losing you, of not being good enough for you. I’ve never stopped loving you.”
Hazel’s eyes widen slightly at my admission. She sets the journal aside and leans forward, her gaze intense. “And what do you want?”
I take a shaky breath, and take a risk, sitting down next to her on the sofa. She pulls away slightly, and I know she needs more. I drop to my knees and take her hands lightly in case she wants to pull away again. Shedoesn’t this time. “I want you, Hazel. All of you. I want to wake up next to you every morning, to hold you when you’re sad, to celebrate your joys. I want to be your partner, your lover, your friend. But more than that, I want you to be happy, even if that means letting you go.”
“Why did you do it, Noah? Why did you betray me like that?”
I close my eyes briefly, shame washing over me. “Because I was scared. Scared of how much I loved you, scared of losing you. I thought if I could control certain aspects of your life, I could protect myself. But all I did was hurt you, and that’s unforgivable.”
Hazel is quiet for a long moment. Finally, she says, “I’m scared too, Noah. Terrified of the things you’ve done to keep me. I’m terrified of being hurt again. Of trusting you all only to have my heart shattered into a million pieces.”
I squeeze her hands gently, my heart aching at the pain in her voice. “I understand, Hazel. You have every right to be scared. We’ve given you so many reasons not to trust us.”
She nods, a tear slipping down her cheek. I resist the urge to wipe it away, knowing she needs this moment.
“But I’m tired of being alone,” she whispers. “I’m tired of being tired and I’m afraid.”
“What do you need from me, Hazel?” I ask softly. “What can I do to help you feel safe?”
She looks at me, her green eyes searching mine. “I need time, Noah. I need to know that you’re not justsaying these things because you think it’s what I want to hear. I need to see real change.”
I nod, understanding completely. “I’ll give you all the time you need. I’ll show you every day that I mean every word. No more manipulations, no more half-truths. Just me, trying my best to be worthy of you.”
Hazel’s eyes search mine, as if trying to gauge the sincerity of my words. I hold her gaze, willing her to see the truth in my eyes, the depth of my feelings for her.
She nods slowly, but she doesn’t smile. “I need to think about what you’ve all said and done. Just give me a couple of days, okay?”
“Take all the time you need. We aren’t going anywhere.”
“Okay, thank you.”
I let her go, and I stand up to leave. There is nothing left to say, except, “I love you, Hazel. Please forgive us.”
She smiles then, and it lifts my spirits. Maybe not all is lost.
I leave her home, closing the door quietly behind me and I drive to the house that Carter rented, assuming I’ll find him there.
I’m not wrong.
I pull up on the driveway next to a medium-sized skip and Carter flinging that gross, damp mattress into it.
“Well?” he says as Zach comes outside with that creepy headless mannequin, which he chucks into the skip with a look of distaste.
“She said to give her a couple of days.”
“Her birthday,” Zach says instantly.
“Yeah. I guess the pact will come to pass, or she tells us to fuck off back to Cornwall.” I give Carter a resigned stare, which he returns.
It’s going to be the longest forty-eight hours of our lives.
