Page 33 of Icebreaker
Without a word or a request, Daddy B pulled my plate toward him and began preparing my food. He spread the butter, sliced the pancakes, and after checking with me, poured the syrup before sliding it back over. He did it all before he even touched his plate. It felt natural and right, and I wanted more.
“Are you worried about my lack of experience?” Daddy asked me out of the blue.
“Whoa! Where did that come from?”
“It was on my mind.” He shrugged. “So I asked.”
My first instinct was to deny and smooth over my concerns because it felt like the polite thing to do. It wasn’t a secret to either of us that I was really, truly interested in him. Saying nothing would be foolish. I might be scattered and easily distracted, but I was logical.
“Yes and no.”
“Let’s get the yes part out of the way. What are you worried about?”
“I don’t know if I would call them worries so much as concerns.”
“What’s the difference?”
“Worries are active and concerns are generalized.”
“Got it. What are your concerns then?”
“If I tell you I have a list, will you be offended?”
Daddy’s indulgent smile eased my churning stomach. He didn’t seem upset by my question at all. “I gotta be honest, kiddo. I’d be more surprised if you didn’t have a list. Give me your top few, and then we’ll figure out the rest.”
“What if you tell everyone on the team and then they make my life miserable?”
“No matter what happens between us, I will never deliberately do anything to make your life harder.” His firm, resolute tone didn’t leave room for argument.
Truthfully, I didn’t think Daddy B would ever deliberately do something like that because I’d never seen evidence that he was that kind of person. I knew he was a one-and-done guy with most of his hookups because I saw the variety after the games. But I’d also seen him interact with them around campus, and they always seemed friendly. Sometimes the players gossiped in the locker room about who they were hooking up with, and I’d never heard him join in. Deep down, I knew it wasn’t likely, but the fear was there.
“All right.”
Daddy B had a mouthful of pancakes, so he held up two fingers and gave me an inquiring look instead of speaking.
“My second is what if my little self is too much.”
He gulped down his bite.
“You mean because you color, watch cartoons, and like stuffies? I already knew that. I saw the nappy cover and the pacifier, so I know that too. And you know what?” I shook my head. “I knew all of that before I kissed you.”
“How are you so cool with all this?”
“My parents and I were talking about kinks one night over dinner…”
“I’m sorry, you were what?” I stammered out after choking on my pancake bite.
“Yeah, when I say it like that, it sounds strange. My dad is a psychology professor who specializes in the study of human sexuality. No sex-related topic was off-limits in our house.”
“Are you serious?” I loved my dad more than anything, but I couldn’t begin to imagine talking to him about being a little.
“Yeah, my parents are weirdly open-minded. So we were talking, I said that sounded interesting, and my dad gave me a full rundown on what it meant and how it was more than just sexual for plenty of people.”
“Do they know you’re a Daddy?”
“They know I’m interested in being a Daddy.”
“That’s wild.” I sat back against my chair and tried to imagine how it would go over in my house.
