Page 58 of Icebreaker
“Yeah, my parents can’t make it, but my brother just moved here, and I thought the two of you might get along. Since he just moved to town, I thought it would be cool if he met someone he’d get along with.”
“You think he’ll like me?” I asked skeptically.
“Yeah, he’s really into cartoons and stuff too. When he wants to relax, he likes to color like you do.”
“How do you know that?”
“The other day, when you were waiting for Tate, I saw you coloring in the equipment room.”
“You like to color?” Rafe interrupted to ask. I glanced at Daddy B before I answered, and he nodded encouragingly.
“Yeah, I do.”
“That’s cool. Me too.” Daddy B’s eyes went soft and he gave me a sweet smile. In my ear, he whispered, “Maybe you should tell Rafe you like stuffies too?”
“Are you serious?” I stared at him in shock. He wanted me to admit that I liked stuffies in public to another adult. That would be the end of me.
“Maybe he needs someone to be brave.”
I knew Daddy B wouldn’t have suggested it unless he had a valid reason. He was meticulous about almost everything. If he was encouraging me to share with Rafe, there was a reason.
“I, uh, like stuffies too. Do you?”
“You do?” He whispered like we’d hatched a conspiracy. “I keep one in my hockey bag, but nobody knows about it.”
“I’m pretty sure at least one person does because B suggested I tell you that I like them too.”
“You think he knows?”
“Pretty sure, yes, but he’d never, ever say anything.”
Rafe looked around the table, and after seeing that everyone appeared to be preoccupied, he asked, “Is he your Daddy?”
“Why would you ask that?”
“Because I’m jealous that you have one.”
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
BRENNEN
“Hey,kiddo, can you come in here for a second?” I asked with what, I hoped, was not a shaky voice.
I’d spent the afternoon before the game doing everything I normally did. For my last match of my college career, I wasn’t taking any chances. Even though I knew going any further was never in the cards for me, it was still a little bittersweet to realize this was the end of something I had done since I was four years old. The first time I’d strapped on a pair of skates had felt like coming home. The ice was always the first place I wanted to be and the last place I was. My parents had never worried about me getting in trouble. One threat to take away my gear, and I fell in line.
Even the realization that I was never going to be the greatest hockey player that ever lived hadn’t stopped my enthusiasm for the game. I might not be the best, but I’d worked damn hard to be the best I could be. Since there was a rec league up in Tannenberg, the dream of moving up there was a little sweeter.
Now I just needed to get the offer so that I could stop stressing about it.
“Yes?” Ellie asked from the doorway.
His hair was still wet from the shower and his dewy skin was a deep rose from the practically scalding water. His answer came out a little garbled around the pacifier he’d stuck in his mouth, but still understandable. Since he was going as my guest, Mr. Haddad had given him the day off so he could have the full family experience. We’d woken up slowly. We couldn’t do anything different because, well, superstition. I had my rituals, and Ellie had his.
This morning’s breakfast had been the same as it was on every game day: five eggs, three bacon slices, a half piece of toast, and no ketchup. I wore the socks my grandparents gave me. I’d worn them for my first college hockey game and every home game since. When I arrived at the rink, I’d complete my laps in exactly the same order and pattern I had since I first started skating. I knew it probably didn’t make any difference, but I wasn’t willing to risk upsetting the balance.
Today was the same as it had been for all the other home games since Ellie had moved in. He lined up his stuffies across the couch and gave them a pep talk about needing to be supportive, regardless of how the game went. He reminded them to cheer, but only if they were being nice, never mean, because sportsmanship was apparently important to the stuffie crowd. He put on his favorite onesie along with his favorite pacifier and colored me a picture to put on the refrigerator door. If he couldn’t do it the day of the game, he did it the day before, but there was never a question of it being done.
I hoped the amazement of being his chosen Daddy never left me. When I’d been introduced to the Daddy/boy dynamic, I’d known it was for me. But without any experience, I hadn’t wanted to claim it as my own. Now that I’d had this with Ellie? It was everything I wanted, and I couldn’t imagine not having it with him. And it wasn’t just the Daddy part that was important. It was the being Ellie’s Daddy part that mattered more.
