Page 69 of Enchanted
“You’ll have to, straight out. You took your time deciding if I’d suit you—and your purposes. Once you decided what those purposes would be. When you didn’t know about my bloodline, you considered if you should take me and get out of the duty you weren’t sure you wanted. And when you did know, then it was a matter of deciding if I’d suit you if you did accept it.”
“It wasn’t that black-and-white.” He let out a breath, admitting that sometimes the gray areas didn’t matter. “But yes, more or less. It would have been a big step either way.”
“For me as well,” she tossed back, eyes firing. “But how much did you consider that?”
She whirled away, and had him rushing after her before he’d realized he’d moved. “Don’t go.”
She hadn’t intended to, just to pace off her temper, but the quick desperation in the two words had her turning slowly.
“For pity’s sake, Rowan, don’t leave me again. Do you know what it was for me to come for you that morning and see you were gone? Just gone.” He turned away, scrubbing his hands over his face as he struggled with the pain. “The house empty of you, and still full of you. I was going to go after you, right then and there, drag you back where I wanted you. Where I needed you.”
“But you didn’t.”
“No.” He turned to face her. “Because you were right. All the choices had been mine. This was yours and I had to live with it. I’m asking you now not to leave me again, not to make me live with it. You matter to me.”
Everything inside her cried out to go to him. Instead she lifted her brows again. “Matter to you? Those are small words for such a big request.”
“I care for you.”
“I care for the puppy the little girl next door has. I’m not content with that from you. So if that’s all—”
“I love you. Damn it, you know very well I love you.” He snatched her hand to keep her from leaving. Both the gesture and the tone were anything but loverlike.
Somehow she kept her voice steady. “We’ve established I don’t have the gift to see, so how do I know very well what you don’t tell me?”
“I am telling you. Damn it, woman, can’t you hear, either?” His control slipped enough to have sparks snapping in the air around them. “It’s been you all along, right from the start of it. I told myself I didn’t—that I wouldn’t until I decided. I made myself believe it, but there was no one ever but you.”
The thrill of it—the words, the passion behind them driven by as much anger as heart—spun through her like rainbows. Even as she started to speak, he released her hand to prowl the circle much as the wolf he favored.
“And I don’t like it.” He flung the words over his shoulder at her. “I’m not required to like it.”
“No.” She wondered why she should feel delighted rather than insulted. And it came to her that it gave her an unexpected and desperately sweet power over him. “No, you’re not. Neither am I.”
He whirled back, glaring at her. “I was content in my life as it was.”
“No, you weren’t.” The answer surprised both of them. “You were restless, dissatisfied and just a little bored. And so was I.”
“You were unhappy. And the way you’re thinking now, it’s that I should have taken advantage of that. Plucked you up straightaway, told you things you couldn’t have been prepared to hear and carried you off to Ireland. Well, I didn’t and I won’t be sorry for that much. I couldn’t. You think I deceived you, and maybe I did.”
He shrugged now, a regal motion that made her lips want to curve into a smile. “You needed time, and sodid I. When I came to you as a wolf it was to comfort. It was as a friend. And so I saw you naked—and enjoyed it. Why shouldn’t I?”
“Why indeed?” she murmured.
“When I loved you in dreams, we both enjoyed it.”
Since that was issued as a challenge, she merely inclined her head. “I don’t think I ever said otherwise. But still, that choice was yours.”
“Aye, it was, and I’d make it again if only to touch you with my mind. It’s not easy for me to admit that I want you as I do. To tell you that I’ve suffered being without you. Or to ask you to forgive me for doing what I thought was right.”
“You’ve yet to tell me what it is you expect from me now.”
“I’ve been clear enough on it.” Frustration shimmered around him. “Do you want me to beg?”
“Yes,” she said after a very cool, very thoughtful moment.
His eyes went bright gold with shock, then dark with what she thought was temper. When he started toward her, her knees began to tremble. Then, eyes narrowed, he was down on his.
“Then I will.” He took her hands, which had gone numb. “I’ll beg for you, Rowan, if that’s what it takes to have you.”
