Page 48 of Cold Foot Revenge
“I didn’t want to leave him because I knew he was dying. I felt it happening. Felt the life draining out of my brother, and so I held him, you know? I didn’t want him to be alone, so I sat in the dark alley by that damn dumpster, rocking my brother’s body as he passed. He went still, and I was yelling not to leave me, and that…Roxy…was my wildest night.”
“What happened to him next?” she whispered, sitting on the bed next to him.
“People heard me yelling, finally. It was a couple out drinking, and they were tipsy, trying to help. They called for an ambulance, and I was breaking apart. You don’t understand. Garret isn’t just my brother. He’s my best friend. We were as close as brothers could possibly be. Shared everything. We lived with each other after we left my parents’ house. Shared our first truck until we could each afford our own.” He ran his hands up and down his face, trying to ease the headache that was building behind his eyes at these awful memories. “I heard the sirens in the distance, and Garret’s body twitched. I was hugging him so tight and I could feel something happening. He jumped, and I shoved him back at arm’s length, just shocked. And this noise came from inside of him that chilled my blood.”
“A growl?”
He nodded.
“The bear was being born.”
He nodded again.
Roxy slid her hand into his and intertwined their fingers, and the sense of relief that he felt was overwhelming. He leaned his shoulder against hers just to touch more of her.
“Did you know what it was?” she asked softly.
“Not until he opened his eyes. They were different and glowing in the dark, and I knew that wasn’t my brother anymore. Not the way I knew him. The sirens were getting louder, and I shot up and was shoving that drunk couple out of the alley, saying something was wrong and they were in danger. Garret came to then. That’s what he remembers—being alone when he woke up with the bear inside of him. He wasn’t, not really, but that’s stuck in his memory. I got him up and dragged him to my truck, and the noise inside of him was steady. I was half-drunk and fully panicked, and didn’t know the right thing to do, so I just got him the hell out of there. I didn’t know how long it would be before he Changed and didn’t want anyone to know what he was. I just didn’t understand. He was my brother when we went to the bar that night. He was Garret. And then he wasn’t.” Dylan chewed his lip. “That was a wild night. Someday I’ll tell you about the first time he Changed, and I had to pull a shotgun on him and fill his hide with buckshot to keep him from killing me. Yeah. I pulled a trigger on my brother. Someday I’ll tell you how I got him out of trouble for Changing in the middle of town on accident, and the sleepless nights while I made sure he slept and wasn’t taken over by the animal in the middle of the night. Or about how I slowly morphed my life to obsess over him being okay. Or the frustration that he couldn’t get control of the bear. Or the questions we had to find the answers to the hard way. Always the hard way. There was no Maker to tell us what the hell to expect, and we didn’t know any shifters who we could ask. We thought he would hibernate like regular grizzlies, so we moved away from here and landed in a little town where nobody knew us, and that first winter, we dug out a den just in case, and camped out there for weeks while he Changed over and over in the most brutal, painful shifts you can imagine. He bled so much. Someday I’ll tell you all about my hundred memories of camping out in the woods with him knowing each Change hewould probably make his way back to camp and kill me because he had some kind of disconnect problem with the animal.” He gritted his teeth against the tightening sensation in his throat. In a whisper, he told her, “Someday I’ll tell you about the relief I felt when he met Raynah and the Cold Foot Crew, and I finally had someone to help me help him. Someday I’ll tell you all about the look on his face when he stared at Raynah’s newborn baby. Someday…fuck.” He shook his head and looked away from her so she wouldn’t see the weakness in his eyes. “Someday I’ll tell you all about how goddamn big it felt when I figured out he was going to be okay. And someday I’ll tell you about how empty and unnecessary I felt when I didn’t have to take care of my brother anymore. Selfish, right? He was my purpose. He was the reason I stopped being chaotic and unreliable. He was the reason I stopped drinking as much, and he was the reason I moved to Darby and got a steady job so when and if he lost his own job due to the damn bear someone had forced into him, I would be able to cover us. All of my reasons for being a good man disappeared when Garret became the good man again.” God, that felt awful to admit. “Someday I’ll tell you about the need to hunt down whoever did this to Garret, and how it’s not just for my brother, but for me too, because whoever did that to him took away the man I was too, and I don’t know what to do with the man I’ve become.”
“Oh my gosh,” she whispered, pulling his face back toward her with her gentle touch.
Her eyes were rimmed with tears, and his eyes were burning pretty good now too.
He pulled her hand to his lips and kissed her palm. “Someday I’ll tell you how upset it makes me when you say things like ‘I’m just a stripper’ or that I don’t have to be a gentleman to you, because for the last few days, the man I’ve become makes sense to me. Because of you.”
Smoothly, she crawled onto him and hugged his neck tight…just melted her body to his.
Slowly, he slid his arms around her little waist and pulled her closer, then buried his face against the side of her neck, right where that bite mark was. “Someday I’ll tell you how I don’t regret that claiming mark,” he murmured low.
“Oooh, Dylan,” she murmured thickly. “You deserve better than to tether yourself to someone like me, but someday, I’m not going to feel that way.”
“What do you mean?”
“I have some work to do on me.” She sniffed and eased back, cupped his face in her hands, and offered him a pretty, emotional smile. “I like your story.”
“It’s a mess.”
“Mine too. If you were too perfect, I wouldn’t understand you.” She inhaled deeply. “Loyal boy.”
“To a fault.”
“No,” she said, shaking her head. “Your brother deserves your loyalty.”
“So do you.”
She angled her face to the side and searched his eyes. “Dylan.”
“You can hear the truth in my voice,” he told her. “I know you can. You deserve good, Roxy.”
“I can hear that you believe what you say. To you, it’s the truth.”
Dylan shrugged. “Good enough.”
“I dance for men—”
“Noo,” he drawled out. “Party foul. This can’t be the discussion every time we talk. It’s your job. It’s not who you are.”
“Itiswho I am. I need you to accept it, not ignore it. I can’t stop reminding you until you accept it.”
