Page 77 of The Highlander's Auctioned Wife
She left quickly, abandoning him in the gardens before she made an even greater fool of herself than she already had. And as she did, her hand flew to her chest, feeling that steadfast little flame sputter out with an almighty bang.
CHAPTER 37
The hammer came down hardon the glowing metal blade, sparks erupting like fiery salt spray, as sweat poured down Gordon’s back, dripping from his brow. He wasn’t certain how long he’d been holed up in his forge, but until he had hammered out all thoughts of Anna, he wouldn’t be leaving.
Thus far, he hadn’t managed to rid himself of a single memory.
It hasnae been more than a week. In time, I’ll forget her.
Picking up the smoldering blade with a thick glove, he took it to the water barrel and dunked it in. A splintering crack cut through the air, a sharp expletive hissing from his lips. A hundred times, he’d tried to forge this sword; a hundred times, it had cracked or shattered, forcing him to start again.
“Looks like it doesnae want to go together,” a voice said from the doorway.
Gordon watched the steam rise from the barrel, wondering if he ought to attach a bell to that door, so he wouldn’t be surprised by unwelcome visitors.
“Leave me be, David,” he muttered, grimacing as the water stilled and revealed his reflection.
“I’d love to,” his m an-at-a rms replied, “but ye’ve an uncle and a cousin upstairs who keep pesterin’ me about ye, askin’ if ye’ve eaten, if ye’ve slept, if ye’ve bathed. And as long as they’re pesterin’ me, I’m goin’ to keep pesterin’ ye. So, whenwasthe last time ye did those things, so I can report back?”
Gordon didn’t reply, stalking over to the crate of sword pieces that he had collected over the years, tucked away in the corner of the forge. He crouched down, picking through the jagged fragments, certain that the next sword he attempted to make would stay whole.
“A letter came from Lady Anna this mornin’,” David said, and Gordon froze.
“Did she leave somethin’ behind?”
“It wasnae for ye,” David replied coolly. “It was for Sophia, apologizin’ for the hasty manner in which she departed. Ye should probably send a letter back, though, apologizin’ for nae even botherin’ to say goodbye to her when she left. She looked for ye, ye ken, right before she got in the carriage. She was pretendin’ nae to, but I could tell she was.”
Gordon clenched a fragment in his hand, the dulled edge biting into his palm. “I couldnae.”
“What? Did ye say somethin’?”
Floundering for a single sentence that could encompass the depth of his regret, Gordon let his actions speak for him. Anger and sorrow pummeled through his veins, his weary arms still possessing enough strength to flip the entire crate of sword fragments, sending them skittering across the worn floor in every direction.
“I couldnae!” he roared, grasping the hammer and slamming it down onto the anvil. “I couldnae watch her leave, for pity’s sake! I couldnae say goodbye because it would have ripped me withered heart right out of me chest! But I’d watch her leave a thousand times over, if it meant I dinnae have to see her shrivel and dim at me side, because I took away her freedom and her choice! She deserves love, David. She deserves a man she chooses, nae the best of a meager selection, all there for the same daft reason!”
“Idiot. Ye bloody idiot!” David shot back.
Gordon whirled around, hammer still in hand, glaring at his m an-at-a rms. It wasn’t wise to poke the bear when it was already hurting.
David seemed to realize that, as he bowed his head and apologized in a rush, lowering his voice as he said, “I’m sorry, M’Laird. I shouldnae have spoken to ye like that, but… yearean idiot.” He cleared his throat, clearly nervous. “And if ye keep actin’ like this, hidin’ away, tryin’ to bash away yer feelings for her, then ye’ll lose her forever.”
“I cannae love her, David,” Gordon insisted, breathing hard.
Shaking his head, David smiled. “Aye, ye can. Ye can because ye already do. Ye as good as admitted it when ye said that sayin’ goodbye to her would have ripped yer heart from yer chest. And the fact ye were willin’ to let her go, to give her freedom, shows ye love her, even if ye could’ve just loved her here instead andnaebeen a prized fool. But it’s a mistake ye can remedy if ye’re quick.”
“What do ye mean?” Gordon faltered, his heart beating strangely, as though it was trying to let him know that it was there, and that it beat for Anna.
Is he right? Do I… love her?
The fact that he hadn’t slept or eaten or bathed or left his forge for the better part of a week suggested that, at the very least, he felt something for her. Felt alotfor her, if he dared to be honest with himself.
But to love is to lose…It didn’t matter that Beathan was dead and buried in an unmarked grave; there’d be others. He couldn’tallowhimself to love Anna, because he had no doubt that it would make him insufferable and overbearing, keeping an eye on her all day and all night, terrified of the moment he would look away and she would be taken from him.
“I heard her faither is plannin’ another auction soon,” David replied, raising a pointed eyebrow. “So, it looks like ye were wrong about her havin’ her freedom to choose. If anythin’, what happened at yer almost-weddin’ seems to have made Laird MacTorrachmoredetermined to get his daughter married off.”
Gordon gripped the handle of the hammer until his knuckles turned white, his teeth gritted as he rasped, “I daenae care. I’ve done me part. The rest is… up to her.”
“Aye, of course ye daenae care.” David rolled his eyes. “That’s why ye’re about to snap that handle in two. That’s why ye’re down here tryin’ to make an impossible sword.”
