Page 49 of My Solemn Vow
“Like a date?” she asks, raising an eyebrow.
The suspicious side-eyed look is cute as fuck.
“Why not?” I shrug, taking another step away from her. “We’re already married, we can’t date too?”
I want to hold out my hand, to walk hand and hand with her to the restaurant even though the parking lot is small. But I don’t because I’m a coward, afraid to be rejected by the woman I’ve married, fucked, and met this morning. Not in that order, but why would I put myself up for rejection?
“So, you’re taking me to a burger joint for our first date?” She looks up at the sign above the door with an overexaggerated squint.
“And wings,” I add, pointing to that part of the sign before holding the door open for her.
I like this easy banter. The sassiness from her. I wasn’t lying when I told her I like her spark.
“This place is a favorite,” I say as she walks through the door.
Other women, especially those who come from a lifestyle with money, would, without a doubt, feel some sort of way about me taking them to a burger joint, but Antonella’s disgust is fake and all in jest.
She’s smiling and her shoulders are relaxed. Composed-and-calm Antonella seems to be fading away, and I’m seeing more of the woman underneath. The woman who isn’t there for display purposes only.
Usual friendly service sees us seated in a booth in a quieter portion of the restaurant, and with drink orders taken and delivered, silence settles between us.
I try to come up with something that won’t sound like an interrogation, but ‘tell me about yourself’ is such a basic conversation starter.This isn’t an interrogation. Get to knowher, not what she knows.But the longer I sit with that, the answer is obviously to do both.
“What’s something that’s always been on your bucket list that’s easy to do, or visit or whichever, but you haven’t done?” Antonella asks, breaking the awkwardness before I can.
It’s unexpected, and I find myself stuck with the question. My mind goes a little blank at the thought, and despite knowing that not having an answer is generally not what people want to hear from a leader, I tell her the truth. “I’m not sure... I have anything.”
“What?” Antonella scrunches her face, giving me a slightly disapproving look. “Everyone has a bucket list. Something you want to do or see before you die. It can be as silly as, like, wanting to swim with sharks.”
I shake my head but wobble my hand. “No? I guess. I have goals but not set things I’d like to do.”
“Such as?” Antonella presses.
“I’d like to go a full year without being shot at.” I can’t help but smile. “Though, maybe... my luck has changed, and the next year will be the one.”
Antonella, who had been taking a sip, almost spits it out in a laugh. “Oh, good God. Can you imagine life without always looking over your shoulder? I was close in grad school, but... well... men.”
I hum my agreement. While it’s not the same, even if I’m not getting shot at, I know there are plenty of enemies looking to take the pack down. And it’s possible, even within the pack, that someone is looking to unseat the Cavanaghs from the alphaposition. My birthright is not a guarantee. A challenge could come.
“What got you into teaching?” I ease myself into the dozens of questions I want to ask her.
Be friendly, take an interest not an interrogation.When did my job become an interference in interacting with people like a regular person?
“I’ve always loved kids.” Antonella’s smile comes back. “I guess it comes from having a big family. Teaching was something I thought I’d be good at. College was the only way I was getting some separation from the life that was expected of me. I knew I’d never fully get away from it, but it was something I could do for me. It’s why, uhm, I kept things so —”
She struggles for a word, and her cheeks flush. I can’t smell her arousal over the other scents in the restaurant, but I assume it’s there.
I offer her an out. “Platonic?”
“Divinely feminine.” Antonella corrects me. “Bringing someone home would never have been acceptable. Gregorio kept bouncing around having a plan for me. It was easier not to argue with him. And it was easier to hide something going on between me and someone I could pretend was a gal pal, not a girlfriend.”
I hold back my next question and try to come up with something relatable to what she shared, but we have nothing in common in that regard. Until today, there had been options, and had I found my mate, I could have been with her, no problems. Sure, I had an expectation that it may be arranged if the time came, but my parents wouldn’t have denied me someone if I truly wanted them.
I’ve also never had to hide who I was from the people who care for me. It seems that maybe Antonella and I have very similar thoughts toward Gregorio D’Medici if I read between those lines.
“What about you? Did younger Valor ever think about leaving the chaos and never looking back?” She prompts, chaos clearly code for criminal lifestyle.
“I never wanted to escape my destiny. I knew from an early age I was the next head of the family. I’ve wanted it for a long time. Maybe it’s too 1950s of me, but I always knew what my life would look like, and I liked what I saw. Maybe that’s more an answer to your bucket question. Life with a ma — nsion, a kid... and a wife.”
