Page 58 of Drowned in the Pleasure of a Devilish Baron
And then he thought of Sarah.
I will never be able to ask for her hand now. She will be married off to another man and I will never get to hold her in my arms again.
The thought made him ill.
“Well, well, well.”
He turned at the voice behind him to see John crossing the fields toward him, a smug grin on his face.
“I always knew you were a failure,” John said with a laugh. “But it seems even I underestimated how spectacular and sudden your failure would be!”
Felix, recognizing the truth in his words, did not have the heart to reply. But then John said Sarah’s name.
“You didn’t have a hope of marrying Sarah anyway. I have already found the perfect gentleman for her.” He leaned closer, as if to divulge a secret. “And he’s actually willing topayto have her.”
This thought, this insidious little comment that John would sell off his sister to the highest bidder, put the nail in the coffin for the life Felix and Sarah had dreamt up together, melted the ice in his chest in one flood, sending the previously forgotten anger aflame once more.
With a roar, he threw himself across the space between them. John, rather than looking startled, smiled grimly as if he had anticipated that Felix would do just that. He met him chest to chest, as eager to fight now as he had been just minutes before.
The air filled with the sounds of flesh hitting flesh. Felix got in the first blow, a striking fist that snapped John’s neck back with the force of it, and also served to wipe the smirk from his face at last, something he noted with great pleasure. John avoided the next one, going low so he could wrap his arms around Felix’s waist and knock him into the ashy dirt beneath them. They rolled together on the ground, grappling for the upper hand, which Felix achieved at last, pinning John to the ground beneath him.
He glared down into John’s face, seeing the one man acting as an obstacle between himself and the only woman he had ever wanted.
“Felix!” The shout grabbed the attention of them both, and they turned to see Leonard sprinting toward them. “Felix, John, stop!”
Felix came back to himself at the sight of Leonard. He looked down at his already reddened hands and put one to his jaw, which was beginning to swell. Shame rose, and he rose with it, off of John and back, away. John rolled to his knees and stood as well, but his eyes remained murderous.
“What is going on?” Leonard looked around at the fields, the two men, the farmers still milling about. “What has happened?”
John answered first, yanking his sleeves down his arm with hands shaking from anger. “Why don’t you ask old Felix here? I’m not staying any longer for this.” With that, he stalked across the fields, shoulders sitting high.
Leonard turned a confused face to Felix, who sighed.
“It’s all over, Leonard. All of it. There’s nowhere to go from here.” Even he could hear the deadness in his own voice. That icy block was back in his chest, freezing over all of the other feelings. Leonard began to speak, his face white with shock, but Felix shook his head.
“It’s over.”
And he began a slow, trudging walk back to the cottage.
Chapter Thirty-One
Sarah spent the day pacing. What had happened between Felix and John in the house and then the yard? Had Felix come to ask for her hand but been denied? The not knowing was eating her up inside. She had been waiting by the door when John had returned home, a bruise on his jaw and a swollen, bulbous nose. He had ignored her questions completely, storming to his rooms and slamming the door so hard the whole house had shaken, and had not appeared for lunch or tea.
Surely he will come down for dinner, and I can ask him what happened then.
Oh, to be locked in the house at this moment! She was desperate to ride to Cunningham Manor, to speak with someone, anyone who would tell her truthfully what was going on! But more than that, she wanted to see Felix once more. Her heart could not slow after seeing John hurt. Was Felix hurt as well? She felt confident that he could hold his own against her brother, but what could have caused him to actually fight? It was so out of character of the level-headed, gentle man she knew.
Worse than her worries about their fight even, was the smoke she had seen rising in the distance. She had run to her window after John had ordered her upstairs, had seen the farmer arrive and watched Felix blanch at his words. There had been a fire, maybe on his land. What had happened?
These questions and more rolled around her head like a giant ball that would not stop spinning. She paced her room the whole day through, sitting down to write to Juliet, and then dropping the quill and walking to the window, and then back again.
The secret communications with Nut had actually gone rather smoothly thus far. The boy was quick and secretive, with a cleverness she had not expected in one so young. So far he had managed to send and deliver two letters between Sarah and Juliet. She had given him another one today, which hopefully would have already made it to Juliet, and she would have a response ready for him tomorrow morning.
But she decided she could not wait any longer. Straightening her spine and setting her jaw, she decided it was time to do something. She ran to her wardrobe and pulled out her riding habit. It would be difficult to dress in it without Rebecca’s help, but she would manage. Fingers shaking, she pulled off her gown and pulled on her habit a piece at a time.
It was a bit loose, but manageable enough. She pulled her riding boots out but held them in her hands, not wanting the heels to click as she sneaked through the halls to the stable and give her away. She tied her hair back in a tight bun, so it would be out of her way. Dressed and ready, she watched the window, forcing herself to be still and pay attention.
The house itself was silent. John was sulking in his rooms, their mother was likely taking her afternoon nap before dinner. Rebecca would be in the kitchen, having her own afternoon meal or doing whatever else it was she did when she was not needed by the ladies of the house.
