Page 9 of Indecent Desires of a Proper Lady
“Margaret, I have known you for a long time. I have seen your abilities and talents. You are one of the most talented women of my acquaintance. I am deeply sorry for the loss of your father, for that would leave anyone with a hole in their heart. But he was right to believe in you. You can do anything you desire, and you will excel at it. You will find your way once again. This sadness is only for a time.”
Margaret simply blinked in surprise at the man. He had just given her the most touching speech she had ever received. How was she to reply? What could she say that would not be unseemly or ungrateful for his kindness?
She opened her mouth to speak, but to her amazement, he spoke again. But this time, his voice was lower, as if he was sharing a secret with her.
“I have always admired you, Margaret, for your strength, your intelligence, and your skills.”
Margaret was completely bowled over. She searched for the right words, fumbling with the damp handkerchief in her hands. She needed to think of the words, but she also couldn’t tear herself away from his eyes.
At last, she was able to get out, “Thank you, Philip.” She took another breath. “No one has ever said such things to me before or made it seem like there was still hope.”
He nodded and smiled. “It was my pleasure. Now, you do not have to paint of course, but perhaps you would prefer to play something? I would offer, but I am no musician.”
He laughed, and Margaret found that she was chuckling with him. Who was this man? She had known him for most of her life, and yet, here they were, sharing such an intimacy that she had never shared with anyone before. Because of her interest in Charles, whenever Philip was around, she had usually ignored him for the most part.
“I think I shall take your advice. To play would be a nice distraction for a little bit.”
She smiled in his direction. He put out his hand to help her to her feet. Feeling an odd sensation of nerves swirling in her belly, Margaret slipped her hand into his. There it was again, that same shock of feeling, that frisson of something that she could not identify. When she lifted her eyes to his as she stood, the feeling only intensified. What was this that made her feel both dizzy and grounded at the same time?
Tentatively, he covered over her other hand with his. “If you need anything, Margaret, you can rely upon me to assist.”
Margaret’s lips parted as she took in a slow breath, trying to decipher the meaning of his words. His voice was so kind and sweet, she was completely under its spell. Then she realized how close they stood. She could clearly see the stubble on his chin that she hadn’t noticed earlier this morning. She noticed the movement of his throat as he swallowed. The room felt small, and for a moment, she forgot everything.
“Margaret,” a cheery voice called, and in a flash, both she and Philip pulled apart from each other.
In her haste to remove herself from his side, she clutched onto the chair in front of the canvas for support. Philip was far behind her. She spotted Juliet’s smiling face in the doorway. For a moment, Juliet looked between the two of them. “We are about to have tea. Now, how did you like my surprise?”
Margaret swallowed, still reeling from whatever had just occurred.
“’Tis lovely, Juliet, although I confess that I was very surprised, was I not, Philip?”
Philip coughed and stepped forward. “Yes, she was very surprised.” He glanced in her direction, and she in his, but she pulled her eyes away quickly and smiled at Juliet.
“Excellent! Well, Margaret, you shall have to paint us something. I just know that Leonard would love it, and I as well.”
Margaret walked to Juliet, and Juliet slid her arm in hers. “Come. We shall join the men for tea and listen to all their odious conversation. I hope that at least Mr. Winston can entertain us.”
She smiled back at him, but Margaret kept her face forward, fearing a flush might still be lingering on her cheeks.
“Your Grace, I shall do my utmost.”
Juliet laughed pleasantly as they wandered to the tea room. Inside, Leonard and Charles were already in conversation, laughing about something. When the ladies arrived, the two gentlemen stood and waited until Margaret and Juliet took their seats.
Juliet said, “Now, gentlemen, since we are altogether, you must tell the rest of us what you have been discussing. ‘Tis only proper tea etiquette. We would not want our guests to be left out.”
Leonard laughed. “Of course not, My Dear. Charles and I were just discussing the somewhat adventurous days of our past. The days that are still continuing for Charles and Philip.”
Margaret tried to keep her eyes down, hopeful not to catch Charles’. She was still embarrassed by the morning’s awkward encounter in the hallway, and she prayed that Charles would not bring it up in front of everyone. At least Philip had helped buoy her spirits.
At the mention of adventurous days, Margaret lifted her eyes to Philip only, who looked slightly uncomfortable.
Charles said, with a laugh, “Well, only this morning, our dear friend Philip was telling me about his ‘purity of heart’.”
“Is that so?” Leonard burst into laughter again. “Good to hear it, my friend.”
Margaret was very curious about what it all meant. What adventures? Sometimes she longed to know what lay outside in the world. Here she was trapped by rules and regulations and duties, while men could seemingly do whatever they pleased.
Leonard continued, “Philip, tell us about your fencing. Have you continued in these past months?”
