Page 36 of The Marchioness of his Desire
“It is always a pleasure to see my dearfriend,” and he emphasized the final word, before backing out of the room.
As soon as the door was closed, Nicholas rounded upon Rebecca, an angry look in his eyes.
“I am humiliated,” he cried, throwing himself down into a chair in the corner of the room, as Rebecca rushed to his side.
“I did not seek his company, I assure you I did not,” she pleaded, but Nicholas shook her arm off, shaking his head.
“But you did little to prevent it. How many times has he been here in previous days? Twice? Three times? This is the fourth, is it not?”
Rebecca looked at him in astonishment, amazed that he should know the fact of the matter, when she had kept Edward’s presence a secret.
“But how … yes, he has called here four times in the past few days, but never at my invitation, I assure you. He is lonely, that much is clear, and I can hardly cast him out, given all that we have shared in the past.” She folded her arms as though in defiance of the insult he now bore.
There had been no impropriety upon her part, nor would she even entertain the thought of such a thing. Edward was a reasonable man, one whom she was happy to be on friendly terms with. It was not in her nature to be rude, nor did she believe that Edward’s presence was a humiliation to Nicholas, the man whom she had chosen to marry.
“So, my mother was right …” Nicholas said, half under his breath, and Rebecca looked at him in surprise, as he continued to speak. “In the past, that is, not the present, nor the future. I do not want him here; I do not believe you do either, or am I mistaken?”
“I will happily entertain him, if he calls upon me, but I will not court his presence, of that I assure you. I have made my decision in matters of the heart, and I assure you that there is no need for jealousy,” she replied, words to which Nicholas let out a splutter.
“Jealous? Of an upstart naval officer with ideas above his station? I think not, Rebecca.” He sat up in the chair with a hurt expression upon his face.
“Then why is it a matter of concern to you, Nicholas? If Edward should call upon me as a friend, am I to turn him away? As he himself suggested, it is a cruel husband who forbids his wife her friends,” Rebecca said, still astonished at Nicholas’ outburst over a simple social encounter.
“But until only a short while ago he was far more than a friend, and I find it quite astonishing that he should so readily have turned from betrothed to close confidant without any of his previous feelings residing in him. Are you to tell me that he has fallen out of love with you and yet wishes to remain your friend?” Nicholas fixed Rebecca with a searching gaze.
She was surprised by the look in his eyes, a look of hurt, as though his feelings had been truly bruised by the intrusion of Edward into their lives. It was he who had told her that this was a marriage of convenience, the doubts having set in as to whether or not he himself had any feelings for her beyond mere friendship.
“I assure you that he has behaved with nothing but honor during his visits here, and there is no sense or question of his still being in love with me,” she replied, and Nicholas shook his head.
“And what of you? What are your feelings for him?” he asked, causing Rebecca to blush.
“I was never in love with him. That was the trouble.”
Nicholas sighed and shook his head, placing it in his hands and staring down at the rug beneath his feet. She reached out and put her hand gently upon his shoulder, causing him to startle.
“I am sorry, Edward is right, you do not deserve a husband who prevents you from being a friend, whoever that friend might be. But if you do possess any feelings for Edward, then I would ask that you tell me. I would be willing to let you go, for happiness sake, if that is what you wished,” he said, looking up at her, his eyes wide and tearful.
Rebecca shook her head and smiled at him, sensing for the first time the true feelings in his heart.
“It is you I love, Nicholas, not Edward, and it seems that I have found the answer to my own question.” He looked at her in surprise.
“And what question is that?” he asked.
“Whether you love me or whether this whole thing,” and she held up her hand her hand, where the ring he had presented her with upon their wedding day glinted in the candlelight, “this marriage, is merely for show.”
He looked at her and shook his head, a sad look coming over his face once more, as he reached out and took her by the hand.
“I do love you. I love you with all my heart, but I was foolish enough to consider myself unworthy of your love. I have done so little to earn it; I can hardly believe your choice myself. I have felt so inadequate as a husband, which is why I have been so inattentive, except perhaps in those moments when both our passions were aroused. I am sorry, Rebecca, forgive me if you can,” he pleaded, and she smiled.
“There is nothing to forgive, and I am sorry that you have endured the embarrassment of another man usurping your position. It will not happen again,” she replied, astonished at how readily he had been hurt and taking his jealousy as the sure and certain sign that his love for her was true.
“How easily a man’s jealousy is aroused when faced with the prospect of losing the woman he loves,” Nicholas said, and Rebecca laughed.
“Then perhaps the time has come to show that love,” she said, holding out her hand to him.
“You know, it was my mother who observed Edward arriving at the house so often. You must be careful what you reveal to her and what she is allowed to see, for she will use anything against anyone. That is what you must know about her, for she is nothing but a busybody with nothing else to do, unscrupulous in whom she topples for her own pleasure. Be wary of her,” Nicholas said as he rose from the chair and put his arms around Rebecca, who sighed.
“Your mother will see nothing but the bliss of happy matrimony from now on. Even her scheming ways have not been able to break us. In fact, they have brought us closer together,” she whispered, leaning up to kiss him upon the cheek.
