Page 11 of The Baroness of Sin
“I hope I didn’t keep you waiting, My Lord,” Martha spoke from behind him, and he turned to the sound of her voice. Had it always been so pleasant? He was going to offer a greeting of his own but found his voice stopped firm in his throat.
He had already thought Lady Carrington was far too beautiful of a lady to be content with his attention, but, in that moment, she stood before him and left him wordless. Her dress was a buttercup yellow and lovely in design. What James couldn’t get over, though, was the cut of the cloth. The lady’s dress was all but scandalous; it was cut low and revealed the curve of her neck and dip of her collar bone, stopping slightly above the curve of her chest. The sleeves of the dress were also sheer, not uncommon, but he could see that she wore nothing to cover her arms beneath, and he could trace all the way up to her bare shoulders.
“My Lord? Is everything all right?” the Lady asked with a certain coyness to her voice. At that moment James knew this wasn’t some extreme lapse in judgment; she was dressed this way on purpose.
James managed to swallow. “I was simply caught off guard by my lady’s sudden appearance, and my mind had wandered as I had waited,” he said with a smile. He fought the urge to compliment her as he so desperately wanted to. He was worried about what acknowledging the forwardness of her dress would lead to, no matter what that would be.
“Is that so, My Lord?” she asked, fighting a smirk. She clearly didn’t believe his assertion.
James rather brusquely ignored the question to save himself, a sacrifice of his own good manners for the greater good. “Who will be supplying us with music this evening?” he asked.
“For just the two of us? I thought I would play some piano,” she said, clearly a little disappointed that he had not engaged with her. She sauntered over to the piano bench, frowning as Lord Barristen avoided looking at her the whole time.
James took an inordinate amount of time in the lavishly decorated music room trying to find a place to sit. He had first chosen the most obvious place, an overstuffed chair slightly to the side of the piano, but quickly forced himself to move when he realized that this provided an even more direct view of the low-cut dress as the lady had to lean forward slightly to play. Quite flustered, he eventually chose the seat in the music room farthest from the piano.
“My Lord, please come sit closer. I want you to be able to hear properly,” she said with a smile and gestured.
“I think the acoustics of this room will be more than accommodating,” he replied with a polite nod from his distant seat. He struggled to keep his voice even and clear.
“My Lord, you are going to convince me that this is a commentary on my playing,” she pouted, her words a mixture of genuine sadness and a threat, in regards to Lord Barristen’s disregard for proper manners.
James felt he was trapped where no decision he made was the correct one. He resigned to pleasing the lady in the room with him. He moved to a chair just behind Martha. Perhaps if he could avoid the view directly, though part of his was reluctant to deprive himself, he would be able to keep his wits about him.
“That is better, My Lord, but now I can’t see your face. I fear I will be terribly self-conscious if I have to play with you sitting behind me,” she explained. “Not to impose, but it just won’t do.”
“Oh,” James paused and thought. He felt he kept bumbling through this whole situation, and the light flush in his cheeks whenever he caught a glimpse of Lady Carrington’s dress. “I suppose you could have some of your staff move a chair to the other side of…”
“Nonsense,” she said and slid over to one side on the piano bench. She patted the spot next to her with her hand. “There is plenty of room for two.”
“My Lady, I am worried that would be improper. There are certain rules of decorum that we are violating by socializing in this manner. I understand as we are both widowed that some exceptions will be made. That being said, I’m not sure what you are asking of me is acceptable,” James said as firmly as he could, but he could not hide the reluctance in his voice from either of them.
Lady Carrington looked at him, the emotions in her eyes oscillated between fear and frustration. Finally, they filled with resolve, and she took a deep breath. “Lord Barristen, I understand that my behavior might seem unconventional, but… I must be frank with you. My previous marriage was not a happy one.” She saw him open his mouth to speak, and she held up one finger to stop him. “It is a difficult explanation to give, regardless of what you heard. It is also not something I am ready to discuss. That all being said, I wish to seek out a gentleman who makes me feel,” she searched for the word, “special.”
James was thrown for a loop. He was already unsure of where his emotions fell in the situation, but now the lady had presented him with something he hadn’t considered. She desired his attention. “My Lady, I must be frank as well. I don’t know what to say. What you are telling me is something unprecedented in my mind.”
“Surely a lord of your measure cannot be so genuinely humble?” she said, her tone an unclear mixture of humor and cynicism.
James looked back at her with a vacant expression, still unsure of what to say.
Martha was forced to stifle a chuckle. “My Lord, I am asking you for the same thing I asked you for initially, your company. The whole observation I would like to make is that we have some... leeway as far as proper decorum because of our unique circumstances. I ask that, if it is acceptable to you, we just let things be as they are between us in private, whatever that amounts to.”
James' face twisted in confusion. He was not an unintelligent gentleman, but this concept was something quite foreign to him. Could he let things like that just happen? Just toss everything he knew about polite society to the wayside and let his instincts drive him? To grab and touch and hold and taste anything he felt the urge to? The possibilities made his head swim.
They would be letting themselves express things privately. He supposed it might be nice after being alone for so long. He couldn’t fall in love again, nor consider letting himself get married, but to deny his urges and desires would be denying the very thing that made him human. Why torture himself? Is that what Lu would have wanted?
James crossed the room and took a seat next to Martha. “I don’t think any lady has ever been that forward with me,” he spoke softly, his hot breath gently brushing through the sheer covering of her shoulders and causing her to shudder inwardly a little. “Though,” he continued, “I’d be lying if I said some part of me didn’t like it.”
I am glad to hear that,” Martha said quietly, her shyness taking hold now that it was clear that he was interested in returning her affections. “I wouldn’t want to press My Lord into a... type of relationship that he found unwanted.”
“Thank you, My Lady. I believe if anything I want what you are suggesting too much for a civil lord with a civil tongue.” He laughed, and so did Martha, shocked a little but intrigued by his insinuation.
James watched her play in admiration. Admiration in equal parts for the skill in which she played the beautiful music and for her physical beauty. It had been so long since he had been so close to a lady, and her presence alone already stirred things within him.
He would like very much to touch her hands, her wrists, but she was busy playing, and he didn’t want to disrupt the music. He hesitated but decided instead to simply let his hands rest on the bench while she played.
Martha felt emboldened by their conversation and the Earl’s closeness, so she decided to be a bit more playful. She slowly slid her leg down the bench so that it brushed the Earl’s hand. The feeling of his touch sent jolts of sensation through her. Each time he would gently move his hand away, and she would do it again until he understood that it wasn’t an accident. Finally, he let the hand rest and allowed her to touch him for more than a moment.
“My Lord!” Martha gave a small faux gasp, “Don’t think that because I said we may skirt decorum that you can suddenly be cheeky with me.”
