Page 19 of A Deal with her Forbidden Duke
Chapter Seven
“Is today the day you finally tell me what is on your mind?” Tessa asked Madeleine the following day.
The ball that was being thrown in the residence of Lady Morgan’s was in full swing. Madeleine stood in another remade gown, hoping that nobody noticed, wondering what else of hers had been swiped and pawned without her notice. How many items had she lost? She had noticed the rapidly dwindling collection but if she truly took the time to sift through it all…
Her thoughts had tumbled with the question, with wondering what Donald was doing with the money if his debts were still not paid, with how long this had been going on without her notice.
She felt foolish.
The ball allowed her to slip among the crowd and pretend as though she was nobody. In that moment, being a nobody, aversion of herself that would not have to endure all of this, sounded perfect.
When Madeleine did not answer, Tessa leaned in. “I have heard the rumors, Madeleine. I am your closest friend?—”
A loud clearing of a throat came from Colin.
“Colin, you are my husband. You do not count.”
“Then I shall remove you from counting asmyclosest friend,” he teased.
“Colin, is it not time that you joined the other men? See, I spy the Baron of Greenacre over there. You conducted business with him last winter.”
“Indeed I did,” Colin said. “Is this your way of telling me to leave you to have your lady talks?”
“Yes,” Tessa stressed, and eventually Colin conceded and left, laughing.
Tessa sighed. “I love that man ever so dearly.”
Madeleine was almost wistful as she watched her friend’s fondness, but then her expression turned serious, fixed on her. “Why did you not tell me of Lord Kinsfeld’s disappearance?”
Madeleine tried not to slump, to not show anybody that she was defeated. “I cannot discuss it. It—it makes me appear weak, and I amnot.”
“You do not have to convince me of that,” Tessa assured her. “However, I do wish you had told me. We do not need to discuss it, but I would like to know how you are faring. And if there is anything I can do.”
Madeleine opened her mouth to respond, but paused.
For her attention had been caught by the Duke of Silverton, who had just entered the ballroom.
The Duke cut a handsome figure in his dark shirt, waistcoat, and breeches, with the jacket adding the slight hint of fine silver color. His eyes swept the ballroom, briefly landing on her.
A jolt went through her, and Madeleine made sure to turn her gaze away.
“I am all right,” she told Tessa, eager to distract herself from interacting with the Duke.
After her brief break in her composure yesterday, she did not wish to speak with him. He did not want her to press her.
Madeleine had the feeling that the Duke saw through every defense and wall she put up, regardless of what she said or did.
I have long wished for someone to see through my insistences of being all right. I wish to be strong but ache for somebody to tell me that it is all right to not feel strong all the time. I wish them to let me let go.
The Duke was not that person—she had to remind herself of that.
I am married, she reminded herself, frustrated.
I am married to a man who has vanished for a week now. But he will be back. He must return. He cannot leave me like this.
“Madeleine?” Tessa’s voice came to her, as if far away. Madeleine blinked herself back into focus properly. “I asked if you wished to speculate on why the ball was so hastily put together. Colin and I were debating if Lady Morgan feels as though she needs to distract us all from the swindling of her husband’s cousin.”
Madeleine forced a laugh, as she was supposed to. “Indeed. I agree.”
