Page 40 of Prospect
While Sofia takes a shower and gets ready for tonight's party at the clubhouse, I decide to make us a quick breakfast. I'm not much of a cook, but my mom did teach me how to make French toast. Striding down the hall I notice Emma's door ajar, but the house is quiet. That means she's probably already left for work. I stayed with Sofia last night. She and I usually take turns. Some nights I stay here, and other nights we stay at the clubhouse. We've talked about moving in together but have decided not to rush things. I'm still getting settled into club life while Sofia is about to start school. We are young and have all the time in the world. As long as she's next to me in bed every night, I have no complaints. I'm gathering the ingredients from the refrigerator when there is a knock at the door. Striding to the large living room window, I peer outside to see a silver car parked behind my bike. When I swing the front door open, I am not at all prepared for who greets me on the other side. "What the hell are you doing here?" I snap not bothering to hide the venom in my tone.
"Son. I want a minute of your time. Please."
"Sam. Who's at the door?" Sofia asks from behind me.
"My dad," I answer not taking my eyes off the man standing at the door. "You have a lot of fuckin' nerve showin' your face here," I bite.
Coming to stand beside me, Sofia places her hand on my arm, and I instantly relax.
"I only want to talk. I want the chance to apologize," he says shocking me. My father has never apologized to me a day in my life. Sofia squeezes my arm. "Maybe you should hear him out," she whispers so only I can hear. Sofia knows my father is a sore subject and the things he's done are unforgivable in my eyes. He went after the club, and he went after my woman. My dad has no place asking me for anything. With my mind made up, I turn back to the man standing in front of me—the man who looks like my father but doesn't. The man I remember had a certain presence about him. The man staring back at me with pleading eyes is not the William McGregor I once knew. This one is a shell of a man. He looks sad; almost defeated.
With that being said, I still don't have it in me to give a shit. I shake my head. "I have nothing to say to you. You need to get off my womans' porch and get the hell out of Polson." Without another word, I shut the door in my father's face.
Sofia wraps her arms around my middle. "Are you okay?"
I kiss the top of her head. "Yeah, baby. I'm good. I'm not going to let him ruin my day. Now, how about that breakfast?" I ask wanting to change the subject because the truth is, I'm not sure how I feel about what just happened. My whole life all I wanted was for my dad to show some emotion toward me or to tell me he is sorry for all the shitty things he's done. Him showing up here this morning is a little too late in my book. Making my way back into the kitchen I begin to finish the task of cooking breakfast. Hearing the front door open, I look over my right shoulder and watch as Sofia walks out on the porch and retrieves an envelope laying on the railing. "What ya got, babe?"
Stepping back inside, Sofia closes the door behind her. "It's from your dad. I saw him leave it before walking away. It has your name on it," she hands the envelope to me.
Plucking the paper from her outreached hand, I stare down at it.
"Do you want to open it alone?"
I shake my head and swallow. "No."
Deciding to rip the band-aid off, I tear open the letter.
Sam,
I wrote this letter in the event you refused to see me. I knew my chances were slim, but I had to take a chance. What is there really to say except I am sorry? I'm sorry for not being the father you needed and giving you the life you deserved. I only wish your mother was still alive so I could say the same words to her. I want you to know how much I cared for your mom. She was the love of my life. You might find that hard to believe, but it's true. I also know your mother's death is on my hands. I didn't honor our vows. I don't remember the point in my life when I let her go, and god help me, I would give anything to have her back. A few months ago, I was sitting in my office at home, and I suddenly realized I was no longer happy. I thought back to the last time in my life when I honestly felt joy. Do you know when that was? It was the day you were born. I never told you this but the day you came into this world was the happiest day of mine and your mother's life. Your mom made me promise not to turn into my father. She made me promise I would follow my dreams and to teach our child to do the same. I failed her. And I failed you. Unlike you, I gave in to the pressure and became what my father, your grandfather wanted me to be. As the years ticked by that's all I knew and soon enough I did the same thing to you. I had become my father, and I was trying to turn you into me. What had my behavior gotten me? The love of my life was dead, and my son despised me. A son is supposed to look up to his father, but in our case, Sam, it is me who looks up to you. Your mother raised you right. You grew up to be a man who was determined to go out in the world and find his purpose. I only wish I would have been there to see you become that man. I am grateful to the people you now call family and to Jake Delane for showing you how a father is supposed to be to a son. Enclosed with my letter is the one thing in the world besides you that meant the most to your mother. I hope my gift brings you a little closer to your mom and brings you peace. My gift is not only for you but for my love. It's time I show her I am the man she married all those years ago.
Love always.
Dad.
I finish readingthe letter out loud and look over at Sofia who is sitting beside me on the sofa with tears running down her face. "What did he give you?" she sniffles.
Pulling the second piece of paper from the envelope, I unfold it. For a moment I think my eyes are playing tricks on me. "I can't believe it," I mutter scanning over the document a second time. "It's the deed to my grandparent's farm. The one my mother grew up on."
"Oh my god, Sam." Sofia looks down at the paper in my hand.
"Your dad gave you the farm?" she chokes out. "The one he said he sold?"
Swallowing past the lump in my throat, I take a deep breath and try to gather my emotions.
"What are you thinking?"
I blow out a breath. "I don't know. I'm trying to process everything."
Sofia rubs my arm. She doesn't push for more. She knows once I get a handle on what I just read, she'll be the first person I talk to. In the meantime, I can't help the smile that takes over my face. "What do you say we plan a trip to Texas? I'd like to take you to the place that meant the most to me and my mom."
"I'd say when do we start packing," Sofia beams.
Scooping my woman into my arms, I bury my face in the crook of her neck and breathe in her sweet scent.
"I'm so happy for you, Sam. What a great gift."
A few hours later,Sofia and I arrive at the clubhouse. I take in all the cars and bikes parked outside. Everyone is here this evening for my patch in ceremony. Pulling my bike alongside Blake's, I put the kickstand down and shut off the engine. I help my woman with her helmet. She shakes out her hair, then looks at me as she runs her fingers through the scruff growing on my face
