Page 135 of Ironling
When he turned back to her, it was to see the beginnings of a smile on her face as she rose to greet him. He wanted to rush to her, to taste that smile, to gorge himself on the precious moments he had.
Instead, he rumbled, “What is a Choosing?”
Her face fell, and Hakon’s beast growled inside him. Fates, she was going to tell him something he didn’t want to hear.
As Hakon stood in the center of the room and Aislinn paced, she explained this Choosing to him. Suitors, claims, finality. He understood it on its face, even if he didn’t see why it was so binding.
Bayard was forcing her to choose on the eve of battle, and if he didn’t receive the answer he wanted, he intended to decimate her forces before Jerrod arrived to finish it. That was the sum of it, even as she told him every detail she knew about Choosings, from their beginnings to their current legal precedent, as was her way.
He let her talk, hoping at least the sound of her sweet voice would calm him, but it didn’t. All day, since hearing of this Choosing, his body had buzzed as if some force compelled him tomove. He thought her presence might help, but if anything, learning the scope of the Choosing only made it worse.
The buzz became an itch, a compunction. He bit back theneed to throw her over his shoulder this moment and leap from the window, making off with his mate.
When she came to a stop in her pacing and her words, Hakon asked the question that scratched at him all day.
“Will you choose him?”
Aislinn shook her head. “I don’t want to. I’m working with Captain Aodhan on a plan to mitigate his reaction, but…” Tears gathered along her lashes. “I fear the outcome. Hakon, I…I’m frightened.”
He was there in a moment, taking her face between his hands. His green skin stood in such contrast to her warm golden colors. He loved her colors. He loved how she wrapped her hands around his wrists and looked up at him with such trust, such vulnerability. Without speaking, she asked for his comfort.
Fuck Bayard. Fuck all of this.
Nothing should be allowed to frighten her. She deserved all that was right and good in this world, and Hakon railed against all that wasn’t.
“Vinya,” he murmured, “come away with me. We’ll go somewhere new, somewhere safe. I will take care of you, always.”
She gave him the most beautifully sad smile he’d ever seen, her tears slipping into the cracks of his hardened heart to erode away his resolve.
“I wish I could. But, Hakon, I can’t.” She squeezed his wrists. “Good or ill, this is my life. I can’t run away.”
He knew her answer before she said it, but he needed to hear it one more time from her lips.
Closing his eyes, he dropped his head to hers and breathed her in.
Fates, how naïve he’d been when he left Kaldebrak. Thinking that finding and taking a mate would be simple, straightforward. Nothing in this life was ever so easy—and nothing in his lifewould ever be more worth it.
He was worse than naïve, he was a fool. A fool for her.
Hakon loved her. More than was wise and more than he ever thought possible. He’d hoped the stories were true but hadn’t been ready to be proven right. The truth had a way of doing that, rewriting hopes and amending plans.
The little life he’d built in his head was a good dream, and when he pressed a kiss to her soft lips, he mourned the loss of it. Grief didn’t have to be tangible or reasonable, and he’d spent so long running from it. He allowed it its space, his kiss tinged with a sadness for the life that could have been.
He would have made her happy in that meadow. He would have built them a good life, full of happy days and warm nights.
That wasn’t to be. And for the first time, Hakon knew that was all right.
Pulling her close, he held her tight to his chest as he told her, “I choose you, Aislinn. Today, tomorrow, for always.” And he sealed that promise with a kiss, hoping it would be enough.
When he finally lifted his head, she met him with a curious gaze growing to concern.
He couldn’t tell her his plan, for she might try to stop him. Her heart was too good, and he wanted it for himself. So Hakon would do what he should’ve done a long time ago.
With a final kiss, he bid her farewell and left the study.
It was a short walk to the rooms Orek and Sorcha shared. A swift knock brought his friend to the door, a look of bafflement on his face.
“I need your help,” said Hakon.
