Page 194 of Satan's Spawn
I press the side of my face against him and listen to the faint heartbeat calling out to me.
“Thank you for saving me tonight,” I whisper into his skin.
“You weren’t the only one saved,” he responds, so low I’m unsure if I was meant to hear it.
“Make me yours…please.” I run my hands up his rounded pecs until they rest at his cheeks. “Don’t make my last sexual encounter with a man be with Felix.”
Because I’ve taken a silent vow after he kissed me on those train tracks, that I will not give myself to anyone again unless it’s him.
I’m enamored by Crayton—hell, I may even love him despite how crazy that sounds.
“I can’t. Not tonight.” He shakes his head, and if I didn’t know any better I’d say there’s a sense of nerves creeping up on him.
“It has to be you. It has to be tonight.” I implore him. “I can’t wake up tomorrow knowing he’s still with me, and not you.”
“I’ll be with you, I promise, Little Ghost.” He looks down, and it’s the sheepest he’s ever seemed. “But not like that.”
“Why?” The question comes out ragged.
“Because I can’t give you what you need.”
“I only need you. Exactly how you are, no exceptions.”
Crayton’s fighting himself, I can tell by how his eyes twitch occasionally.
“I don’t know how…” He starts, but hesitates to finish.
He doesn’t need to though.
“I don’t either. You know I’ve only been with toys.”
The joke makes us both chuckle, but the seriousness of the moment still lingers.
“I’ve…never been gentle.” He admits, and I wholeheartedly believe him.
He’s a virgin to making love.
Not to sex.
“I can teach you,” I reassure him, but he doesn’t agree.
“No, you can’t. But I know someone who can.”
My eyebrow raises, not sure if I should be intrigued or concerned.
“Someone?”
Crayton inhales a deep breath. “Yeah, someone. But you’re gonna really have to trust me.”
31
CRAYTON
“You must be outta your goddamn mind!” Saint whispers through a yell. “There’s no chance in hell I’m agreeing to this.”
I drag him further away from our door, where Rebecca is inside laying down on my bed, as unsure as I am about what we’re about to do
“You’re the only one I trust with her.” I pause, the next words coming out like sand on my tongue. “With me.”
