Page 114 of Danger Close
A keening moan escaped my lips through my teeth as I grimaced at the memories.
“I twisted myself inside out just for the chance to be with him. To make him stay.”
I placed my wrists on Cobra’s chest, hoping he’d let me push him away. But he was as hard and immovable as a boulder.
“Dr. Annie Zhou was the first to ever explain to me what would happen if I let things go on. That he’d hurt me. And when thatstopped giving him pleasure, then he’d hurt Trinity.” I hated this. I hated reliving this. It felt like a thousand cuts against my skin. “When he hurt her… Dr. Zhou, I knew that she was right.”
I looked away because that was my greatest shame. The pain I caused someone else… the irreparable harm I’d brought to a woman who only wanted to help me.
“I also realized how untouchable he was.” I shrugged. “So, you see, it is all my fault. I caused all of this.”
I put my forearms across my abdomen, creating a barrier between us. I need protection against the hatred I knew would show up in his eyes. If not outright hatred, then at least… disgust. Judgment.
“I… I asked for this.” I shrugged.
“Look at me.”
Tears that collected on my lower lashes fell. The unpleasant heat, then cooling of the moisture on my cheeks sent a chill through me.
“Princess, look at me.” His voice was gentle.
It was so sweet that I had to obey. “Cobra—”
“Joe.” This correction was much sweeter. Almost dotingly gentle.
His eyes dropped to my lips. His thumb gently swiped against my cupid’s bow.
“You want me to treat you rough, I’ll do that.” His eyes hardened, as his lips hovered over mine. “When you’re well, when you’re not covered in gaping wounds, and your heart has healed enough to take it, I’ll be more than happy to tie you spread open on my bed while I make you come so much you forget your own name.”
My thighs clenched. A whimper escaped my lips.
“I’ll be more than happy to put you over my knee, hands bound over your head as I tease you for hours, until you’re nothing but a blissed out mess. I will happily spank your sweet ass pink anytime you sass me.” He grazed his lips over my cheek, pulling away, his lips shiny with the mark of my tears. “If that’s what you need to feel loved, then I’m your man.”
“Cobra…” I whined, even as my core heated.
“Joe.” His voice was so low, and so tender, it made me lightheaded.
“Please. Don’t make me be there when the love in your eyes turns to disgust and shame.” The burning in my chest that told me I was within seconds of completely sobbing burned up my throat. “Please, don’t make me. I won’t survive.”
“I won’t make you be there because itwon’t happen.” He took my mouth. I had no resistance. I had no way to extricate myself from his orbit. From his hypnotic, mesmerizing eyes.
I kissed him back because I had no choice. I was powerless against him.
I reluctantly tore my mouth from his because too much was happening. The crack on my facade leaked out the feelings I tried so hard to contain. The emotions poured out of my eyes, my nose, and overtook my entire body.
“I’m here, baby. I’m here forever. I’m going to love you until the day I die. No amount of pulling away is going to change that.”
“How can you want this?” I wept. “How can you want me after all of this? After all I’ve done?”
“There is nothing wrong about wanting to be loved. There’s nothing wrong about wanting to be loved passionately, deeply, and unconditionally.Ilove you like that.” He bent down until his eyes leveled with mine. “Just because you like to submit to a man in bed doesn’t mean you agreed to be harmed. You gave yourself over with selfless trust, and Raymond Clark violated that. He violated you, when he should have been taking care of you.”
He looked at my hands. The pain in his eyes hurt me far more than the torn flesh beneath the gauze.
“You want someone who loves you? Obsessed about you?” He cupped my jaw, and planted the gentlest kiss on my lips. “You’ve broken five bones. You’ve fractured three. You have no less than a dozen scars over your body.”
I flinched, not liking the reminder of the blemishes that peppered my skin.
“I wasn’t with you at the hospital because I was busy recreating every break, every injury on Raymond Clark. Paying him back for every bit of hurt he caused you.” He kissed me again, nippingat my lower lip. “I’m careful of every injury on your body, and I already know when those bandages need to be changed, when you need to take your pain meds, and how long you’ll be on antibiotics. I’m going to be up your ass making sure you take care of yourself because I want you to heal.”
