Page 5 of Dear Alaskan Bush Pilot
“I understand,” I say, trying not to sound defeated. “If you ever change your mind, let me know.”
"Thank you, dear."
We say our goodbyes, and I hang up the phone. That was not how I imagined this playing out in my head. It was probably all of the romance talk with Aurora that got me thinking that this was a romance story destined to have a happily ever after.
Jack doesn’t say much a few hours later when I tell him what happened. He looks like he wants to say something but doesn’t.
“I can’t believe she doesn’t want to see him.”
"It's been a long time," Jack says. "Maybe it's best to leave things as they are. They've both taken two different paths in life. She was married and presumably had a family. He's retired and living up near Point Hope."
“Wait.” I hold my hand to stop him from going any further. “How do you know that?”
Jack's eyes grow wide like he's only just realized he'd said too much. "It's nothing."
“No, it’s not nothing. You found him, didn’t you?”
Jack's shoulder slump in defeat. "I wasn't going to say anything after you told me that Jera wasn't interested in trying to contact him. But I asked around to some of the guys in Kotzebue. Frank said that Patrick had retired a few years back and moved up north near Point Hope."
“You don’t think that maybe we could—”
“No.”
“I was only going to suggest—”
"Emery, you have to let this go. We can't go against Jera's wishes and tell Patrick about what happened. As far as he's concerned, she never sent the letter. They've moved on, and now so should we."
“I know you’re right, but a part of me still wants to tell you where you can stick your reasonable point.”
Jack laughs. “I have a flight in ten minutes. I can trust that you aren’t going to do anything?”
I nod and pick up the letter. "I'm officially done with this," I say and put it into one of my desk drawers.
4
EMERY
Over the next few days, I try to think less and less about the letter in my drawer. Summers in Alaska are short, and it's important to take advantage of the warmer weather and longer hours of daylight while we can.
Usually, I'd plan to do something with Aurora, but her plan to spend a few days in Fairbanks has been extended to a week with her match. When she called to tell me the news about how well her time there was going, I was excited for her but couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy. I wanted to feel that thrill of excitement that comes at the beginning of any new relationship.
The door to the loading bay opens, and Jack walks into the lobby.
“Hey, how’s it going?” Jack pats me on the arm as he passes me to get to the shelf that holds all the flight log binders.
Ever since the discovery of the letter, Jack's found little ways here and there to touch me like—tucking loose hair behind my ear or leaning in close to grab for something around me. It's like he's trying to test the waters and see how I react. If only he knew that I'd climb up his strong mountain of a body if given a chance.
Suddenly, Aurora’s words from before she left playback in my head.You are going to miss your window to find love if you don’t act soon.She was right in more ways than one. I was going to let my chance at happiness pass me by because I was too afraid to take a chance. Jera took a chance writing that letter to Patrick, and despite the letter not reaching him, she didn’t want to take a risk when given the chance to try and see him again.
I don't want to look back on this time in my life and regret not speaking up for what I want. Sure, he could turn me down, and it would hurt like hell, but it wouldn't kill me. If Aurora can keep putting herself out there and a young Jera could write that letter to the man she truly loved, I can ask Jack out.
The lobby of the airport is filling up with teenagers. They are heading out for an overnight summer trip, and my boss, Thayer, is flying them. I'm feeling brave enough to ask Jack out, but I'm not looking for an audience.
Without saying a word, I take Jack's hand and pull him down the hall and into the employee breakroom. No one is in there, so if he rejects me, we won't have witnesses.
“What are we doing in here?” he asks.
I turn towards him and take a breath before I look him in the eyes. He's got a curious smile on his face, and that dimple that drives me wild appears.
