Page 230 of The Baby Bargain
He chuckles. "I've been to enough."
"Oh, you're—"
He leans back in his seat. "Since rehab, yeah. And I go to meetings every week."
"Do you worry about relapsing?"
He just laughs.
"Am I not supposed to ask that?"
"I don't know. More people should." His expression gets serious. "It terrifies me."
"But you…"
"I try to make something of the fear. But—" His gaze shifts to the black sky. The stars are dull and small. There's too much light here. "I get why Chase has all these walls up. It's hard for me, loving someone, when there's a big part of me that believes I'm going to let them down."
"But you're trying."
"Trying isn't always good enough."
I bite my lip. He's so aware of his flaws and limitations. But that's only done so much to help him piece his life back together.
Hunter is happy. He has friends and family that love him. A girlfriend who adores (and torments) him. A great job.
But all the sobriety and therapy and love can't do anything to change how Chase feels.
Nothing can change how Chase feels.
"Do you think you'll make up?" I ask.
"I don't know." His gaze shifts to the moon. "The sale went through. After the remodel, Inked Love is opening."
"Inked Love?" I ask.
"The new shop." His eyes meet mine. "A little obvious."
"But cute."
He nodstrue. "Brendon offered Chase a gig managing it."
"He'd change shops?"
"Yeah."
"Leave Inked Hearts?"
Hunter's voice softens. "He specifically requests shifts where I'm not working."
"Oh."
"I quit. For him, Wes, and Griffin. I didn't want to be the reason why they couldn't find work."
"You blamed yourself?" I ask.
"It was my fault. I'm the one who lied to Chase. Who picked up a bottle and refused to put it down. I'm—"
"Still plagued with self-loathing." Like Chase, but so different.
