Page 15 of Connie
“You’re at work?” he asks sounding incredulous.
“Yeah, well, I wasn’t just going to sit at home and do nothing.”
“Maybe so but you’ve got broken ribs, Fin,” he chastises. “Have you spoken to Ruben?”
“No.”
“I’m guessing he doesn’t know you’re at work.”
“No idea.”
We chat for a while longer and Nigel tries to convince me to go home and rest but that is the last thing I want to do. I hate being in that house, I have done ever since mum died. It’s not a home to me anymore, barely even a house now really.
It’s just after lunch when my phone rings again. Seeing Ruben’s name on the screen I swipe to the side to answer the call.
“Ru,” is all I say. I want to see what kind of mood he’s in before saying anymore.
“I need you to go to Kingswood. They’re having a problem with air in the system, can you go and give them some help?”
“Yeah of course, Ollie is fine on his own here. Ru, can we-” I start but get interrupted.
“Thanks,” he says harshly then everything goes silent.
He hung up on me. Well I guess that answers my question about his mood.
We end up working late and when I eventually get home I have to spend over an hour tidying up after my dad. It’s like a bomb’s gone off in the kitchen, it’s obvious he’s tried to do some cooking, even though I left him lunch, because there are pots and pans everywhere but as usual the fridge is empty. I try to keep it stocked up but it seems to end up empty every other day. Fuck knows where it all goes. When I get upstairs I see the mayhem isn’t contained to the downstairs today because there are clothes strewn across the landing and all over dad's room.
By the time I’ve finished I’ve gone past the point of being hungry. I make sure Dad has some dinner to keep him going for the night before getting my aching, broken body into bed after a hot shower.
This is the first night in a long time that I haven’t ended up at Connie’s after work. Little does he know but Ruben made it fairly easy for us to sneak around because as soon as things got serious with Emma he was hardly home. It worked perfectly.
I did everything I could think of to keep any suspicions Ruben could have had about us at bay. I felt awful making out like what he had with Emma was a bit of a joke but I just didn’t want him thinking that I wanted something serious. And I really didn’t want him looking too closely because I’m sure if he did he would have seen it, seen the change in me.
I hadn’t been out on the pull since that night I brought a couple of girls back to his place not long after we got back from Aus and I was spending more time than usual at his place whether he was there or not but luckily he never commented on it. His head was too high up in the clouds.
I check my phone before I give in for the day and I shouldn’t be surprised that there isn’t anything from her. I shouldn’t feel this huge wave of disappointment wash over me because I caused this, this is what I thought was for the best, but I do.
Chapter 4
Connie
Thankfully my part timer, Zoe, has been opening up for me in the mornings for the past few weeks. She hasn’t said anything but I’m pretty sure she knows I’m pregnant. She’s got two little ones of her own so she must recognise the signs.
“Good morning,” I sing as chirpily as I can when I get to the counter.
“Morning, Con. How are you?”
“Fine,” I lie.
I now can’t remember a time when I could walk into my beloved coffee shop and not have my stomach turn over at the smell. Coffee used to be one of my all time favourite scents, well not anymore. All it achieves now is making me want to puke. I get myself a glass of water and try to ignore the constant sick feeling in my stomach enough to actually serve some customers.
Summer days are crazy in this village. The place is crawling with tourists taking in the English heritage. It’s great for me because it means everyday is busy, it’s usually tiring dealing with so many customers but it’s completely exhausting these days. By the time I lock the door it feels like the bottoms of my feel are bruised and I can hardly keep my eyes open.
I slouch back on the old and worn out leather sofa that sits in front of the huge windows looking out over the village green and river beyond. My feet automatically perch up on the coffee table and my head rests back. It’s the first time the lyrics of the song that is playing filters into my brain.
As Olivia Newton John continues to sing about being hopelessly devoted and I can’t help my thoughts wander to the one person I really don’t want to think about.
My feelings for Fin make me angry at myself.
