Page 70 of Molly: Part One
“Not drunk enough to spend the night with Holly though evidently.” I can’t help the acidic tone that enters my voice saying her name.
“Evidently,” he repeats back to me sarcastically before turning away and putting the telly on.
“Okaaay. Do you want coffee?”
“No,” he answers abruptly so I make my tea and get the hell out of there.
I place my mug on the side of my now full bath, strip down and slide my body in.
I stay in the bath until it is too cold to sit in any longer just trying to process my thoughts. Ryan brought the blonde home and clearly slept with her. The thought makes me feel sick to my stomach, but wasn’t that what I suggested to him a couple of weeks ago. I said something like I was going out with Adam and I suggest he finds someone too. Except I never really meant it, I didn’t want it to happen. I was, still am, too scared to admit my feelings for Ryan. What if I’m now too late and this Holly is it for him. What if he falls in love with her? I feel tears begin to slide down my cheeks. I’ve done this to myself; it’s all my own fault.
Ryan
I can’t believe I just watched Molly pull him out of the club. She promised me she was going to change, that she was going to wait to make sure the guy was worthy of her. But there she goes after what, a handful of dates going home with him. I feel sick just thinking about it. What if he treats her like the others did? I can feel my anger rising just thinking about the other dickheads.
The woman who is rubbing herself up against me whispers in my ear, “so trying to make her jealous didn’t work then?”
Wait, what? I look down to the blonde totally confused, did she actually just say that or is it the alcohol talking? “What?”
“I said, trying to make her jealous didn’t work then? Well that was what you were trying to do right?” She looks at me totally seriously.
“Uh, I guess yeah. But why would you...?”
“I came with my friends, like you. But also like you they are all paired up. I wanted someone to dance with that wouldn’t lead them to wanting in my knickers so when I seen you pining over her I thought dancing with you would get me what I wanted, a dance with a hot guy and I might actually help you out in the long run. I’m sorry I didn’t.” I just stare back at her in disbelief.
“I can’t believe you would do that. You don’t even know me.”
“I’m a good judge of character and it’s telling me you’re a good one. I just saw an opportunity to help so…”
Wow. “Do you want a drink, um…?”
“Holly,” she adds. “Yes, that would be good.”
“I’m Ryan. Come on.” I place my hand in the small of her back and guide her to a quiet section of the bar. Once we have drinks Holly points over to a booth in a corner.
“So, I…uh…sorry you’ve just taken me totally by surprise,” I say to Holly. “Why did you do that?”
“Like I said, I wanted to dance with someone who wouldn’t want anything from me. I saw you looking at that girl with such love but heartache in your eyes, I knew you’d be a safe choice.”
“But you let me kiss you?” I’m still completely baffled by her.
“Yeah, it meant nothing though. It was just a kiss. Was her face as good as I pictured when you kissed me?”
“Uh, yeah actually, it was pretty good, apart from it made her whisper in her blokes ear and then drag him out of the club. Didn’t quite have my desired effect.” I put my elbows on the table and put my head in my hands.
Holly continues to probe me about Molly and I end up telling this relative stranger everything. She has some great advice but tells me more than once that Molly will cave to her feelings eventually just like everyone else has said. She tries to convince me that although she obviously just went home with Adam it doesn’t mean anything will happen. I can’t knock her positive thinking but she doesn’t know Molly like I do.
I end up getting so drunk I can barely walk so Holly has to escort me home after telling her mates where she is going.
There is a small part of me that is hopeful I will find Molly asleep in her bed when I get home so as soon as I stumble into the hallway I go straight for her room and fling the door open. But nothing, her bed wasn’t being slept in. Holly comes up behind me, grabs my hand and starts pulling me out of the room and up the stairs. She pushes me down on the sofa then goes about making us both coffees.
By the early hours of the morning Holly knows everything there is to know about Molly and me. She is so easy to talk to, it all just comes tumbling out.
I’ve also had a small insight in to her as well. She recently got screwed over by her boyfriend and is not looking for a replacement anytime soon, hence the dance with an unavailable guy.
Talking about Molly and Adam gets me so worked up that I end up pacing the living room trying to get images of them together out of my head but every time I close my eyes all I can see is her grinding against him and kissing him.
“Argh,” I growl before planting my fist into the wall of the living room, then the other one for good measure. The pain takes away my thoughts of them for all of five seconds. I walk over to the kitchen and sweep the glasses and mugs off the draining board and watch them crash to the floor, breaking into shards, just like my heart.
