Page 93 of Falling for Nicole
Chapter Nineteen
Nicole
The sound ofYesterday Once Moreby the Carpenters fades away as I pull my ear buds out and continue to stare at Dec sitting on the fence at the other side of the field. I should be angry that Liv caved and told him where I’d gone, but all I feel is relief. Relief that he must understand where my head’s at, because he’s come to find me, to rescue me from the memories of Mum’s last days that have been on repeat since he left that night. I know I’m being selfish; my mum’s not the important one right now. It’s Susan who needs our help and support, and as terrified as I am about history repeating itself, I know that in reality there’s no way I can walk away from this. Susan, all the Morrisons, mean too much to me to walk away from them because of my stupid fears. Guilt engulfs me as I think about the fact that I should be supporting Dec right now, not running away and getting lost in my own head.
I stand at the exact same time Dec jumps down off the fence. The moment his feet hit the ground, I’m running. My notebook’s forgotten about, along with the pen, and I run as fast as my legs will allow until I’m wrapped in the safety of his strong arms.
The second I feel him squeeze me tightly, the damn breaks and I sob into the fabric of his t-shirt until it’s soaked through. As I breathe in his familiar, comforting scent, images of Mum fill my head. The sound of her infectious laughter and her twinkling eyes, before they were clouded by the pain of all her treatment. Memories of her last weeks, brushing her wiry hair and painting her nails in an attempt to make her feel good about herself. I blow out a shaky breath as I try to rein my thoughts in and focus on what’s important right now.
He doesn’t say anything; he doesn’t need to. All I need is him. I didn’t acknowledge it, but after not hearing from him since he left my house early yesterday morning, I was scared my selfishness had ruined us. That he couldn’t understand my reaction. But he’s here. He came to find me. He gets it. He knows, and he’s here.
I eventually pull back to look up at him with red rimmed eyes and wet cheeks, and I’m shocked to see his eyes are also full of unshed tears.
“I’m so sorry,” I whisper through the emotion clogging my throat.
“Me too. I’m sorry I made you run all this way. We’re gonna get through this together, Ginge. It’s you and me now.” My heart swells with love for him. I can see the dark shadows clouding his eyes as he tries to be strong, and it breaks my heart that he could be about to go through what I did. I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy. A laugh rumbles up my throat as I think about the fact that I used to think of him as my worst enemy. It’s funny how things can change so suddenly, and how the person you can’t stand becomes the most important person in your world.
He cocks an eyebrow, wanting to know what’s amused me, but I put it to one side. “Together,” I agree, as it dawns on me that I’m not alone anymore. So what, he doesn’t want to get married? What the fuck does that really mean, anyway? He’s mine with or without that piece of paper. I’ve got his heart; that I couldn’t be surer of.
“Let’s go home,” he whispers in my ear after dropping a kiss to my temple.
I nod against him. There’s nowhere in the world I’d rather go.
“Let me just say goodbye to Mum.”
“You got it. Take as long as you need. I’ll be waiting.”
Tears sting my eyes once again as I start to back away from him. “I know,” I mouth to him.
* * *
After stopping at the first services we find for some dinner, he follows me all the way back. Not once does he overtake and do the kind of speeds I’m sure he’s desperate to do as we make our way along the seemingly endless motorways. This impromptu little trip seemed like a good idea when it came to me, but now, halfway home and with a numb arse, I’m starting to think it was pretty stupid. I can’t help but feel for Dec as I look in my rear-view mirror; he must be aching like a mother as we approach what must be his eighth hour sitting on that bike today. When he took me out on it, I found it pretty comfortable, but that was only for an hour or so.
The first thing I do when I get in is run up the stairs and get the bath started. It’s been a long, emotional day, and I can’t think of anything better than sinking into the hot soothing water with his arms wrapped around me.
Liv’s sitting watching TV when I come back down. “I’m so sorry,” she says, nodding towards where Dec’s banging around in the kitchen. “He wouldn’t stop until I told him.”
“I can imagine. Don’t worry about it. Are you okay?”
“I didn’t get the job.”
“Oh shit, I’m so sorry.”
She lets out a huge breath, full of disappointment. “It obviously wasn’t meant to be.”
“There will be others.”
“Yeah. They actually said they should have something coming up soon that would be more suited to me. So we’ll see,” she shrugs. “I guess I’ll be heading back home.”
“You’re welcome to stay as long as you like,” I offer.
“Thank you, but I need to get back. I’ve not earnt a penny since being here, and the rent is due soon. I’d rather not be kicked out. It might be a shithole, but at least it’s a roof over our heads.” The look on her face guts me.
“Leave him, Liv. Leave everything up there and move down here. We can find you a job. You can live here until you find yourself a place. Please don’t go back up there just to be miserable.” I can see she’s torn. She’s desperate to do as I’ve just offered, but she’s terrified of leaving and what it’ll do to David. “Well, the offer’s there. Just promise me you’ll think about it.”
“I promise. I’ll leave you guys to it,” she says, getting up and heading towards the stairs.
“No, stay put, we’re going for a bath.”
