Page 26 of Losing the Forbidden
“You should have said something.”
“Honestly, I needed the separation from here.” Guilt hits me again at hiding so much of myself from my best friends.
“Yeah, I think I’m starting to understand that. Why did you never tell us any of this?”
“I didn’t leave under good circumstances. The less I had to think about it, the better.”
“Why did you leave?”
I smile at Liv, who’s kept my secret even without me being there. “My stepdad made me.”
“Made you?” Nicole asks with her brows drawn together. “Why?”
“I fell in love with his daughter and he found out. He paid me to—”
“He what?” comes from behind us. Turning, I find Mum clinging onto the doorframe for support, her eyes wide as she stares at me, willing me to tell her that I’m lying. “Ben? Is that true?”
Letting out a breath, I look over at my mum’s distressed face. “Of course it’s true. Did you really think I’d leave you both willingly?”
She sags against the wall, and both Liam and I are up and off our chairs to catch her.
“He paid you?” she whispers, looking up at me with sad eyes once we’ve got her settled on a chair.
“He did. But it wasn’t the money that forced me to go.”
“W-what was it?”
Looking up to the ceiling, I battle with how much I want to tell her. I know she deserves the truth, but the last thing I want to do is hurt her. She’s already suffered enough pain. I look around at all the sets of eyes staring at me, and I feel awful for her finding out this way. We should have had this conversation in private, not in front of people she hardly knows. But I can’t help feel that it’s better to get it all out in the open.
Looking away from her, I swallow and consider my words. “He threatened you and Lauren. He said he had enough evidence that you…hadn’t been faithful. That he could take everything.” Mum’s face pales and she swallows nervously; it’s all I need to know it’s true. “If I didn’t walk away, he was going to take the business, the house, everything, and leave you with nothing. Both of you. I couldn’t risk it. After Dad, I just couldn’t—”
“You really loved her, didn’t you?” she manages to croak out, taking the focus away from her.
Feeling everyone’s eyes turn on me, I swallow down the lump that’s growing in my throat. “I still do.”
“You need to fight for her, Ben.”
Not able to look into Mum’s heartbroken eyes any longer, I push the chair out behind me, swipe a beer from the fridge, and head out to the garden. Watching her reaction to the truth about her husband on top of Erica’s confession this afternoon is just getting a bit much.
Knocking the cap off on the edge of the table, I fall back onto one of the chairs and tip the bottle to my lips. The cool liquid goes down too easily, making old habits to drown everything out so bloody tempting.
I’ve no idea how much time passes before the sound of the doors opening pulls me from my own head. When I look up, Dec and Liam are heading my way with more beer.
They both drop down beside me and pass me a new bottle. Nothing’s said as we all open them and take a swig.
“The girls are with your mum,” Liam says, and my stomach twists.
“Fuck. I should go—” I go to stand but a hand on my shoulder stops me.
“They’ve got it covered. Stop worrying about everyone else for a few minutes and just take a breath.”
I do as he suggests and drag in a few good lungfuls of air. “The business is going under. This place could end up repossessed and—”
“And we’re going to sort it. You won’t lose any of this.”
“No, no, you don’t—”
“Enough,” Dec snaps. “All you’ve done since the day we met is help me. You practically rebuilt my house from the ground up. You supported me starting the business. You were there for me with everything with Nicole. We will not allow you to do this alone, Ben.”
